My Thoughts From His Love Letter

2011-01-05T22:05:00.001-08:00

Gen 16
Your timing is perfect. I've said this so often, but I think its my life's quote, "It's all about God's timing." Not only do You have a definite will, but You always have a definite time. We get ourselves unto trouble as Christians when we try to manipulate Your timing. Good things done in the wrong time bring frustration and consequences. Such was the case with Sarah. She knew your will was for Abraham to be the father if a great nation, but since your timing was slow in her eyes, she provided Abraham with Haggar.
Lord, I feel I am in the same boat as Sarah was, but I have tried to learn from her mistakes by learning to be patient with Your timing. Here in the last few weeks, I feel like I've started to see the pieces of the puzzle come together, miraculously. And the only way all that can be explained is You. Lord, work Your will and Your timing! I love it when You put it altogether!

2010-12-27T06:47:00.001-08:00

Lev 1-4
I sure am glad that I don't live on the old testament days! All those sacrifices and procedures would be a chore. But they were all a picture of things to come.
Every offering...peace, sin, burnt, meat...one requirement was the same...without blemish. I chuckled to myself as I thought about all the blemished animals. They never had to fear for their life to be taken at the altar. The unblemished animals though were a picture of Christ to come. Only his sacrifice would ben sufficient. Now that I think about it, I'm one of those blemished lambs. It's not that I'm worthless and useless, that's just not my mission. And it's Christ that makes it so that I can live. His perfection took my place.

2010-12-24T20:33:00.001-08:00

Tough stuff..
1 john
Loving Your Brother
I find it kind of ironic that maybe the one person in the world that I have a tough time "loving" is my literal brother (well, other than Allan)
God, its hard to love someone that you feel like is constantly fighting against you. And continually hurts Mom. What do I do? Well, I know what to do, but I struggle with doing it. Forgive, forgive, and forgive again. Don't take it personally but help me to keep my mouth shut Lord, and love instead of criticizing like I so often like to do.

Attitudes

2010-12-23T06:53:00.000-08:00

Matthew 1-2

Talk about extreme insecurity. When Herod heard of Jesus' birth, he was on an immediate mission to kill him. When the wise men mocked him by not bringing word of where this Christ child was so he could "worship" him. He ordered that all the children 2 years and under to be killed. He felt threatened by a baby. He thought he could destroy what had been prophesied by the prophets hundreds of years ago.
I considered all those mothers whose babies were slaughtered because of the wrath and jealously of Herod. What was their reaction to Christ? Was it pure anger toward Herod or to God too because had not Jesus been born at that time their children's lives would have been spared. Herod, too, had no prejudice as to whom should be killed. So their religion or social status had no bearing.

My observations to this....

1. Have my emotions often destroyed those who were "in the way"? A bad attitude whether it's jealousy, anger, depression, etc. can often spill over to others that have nothing to do with the situation. No, I'm physically killing anyone, but I could be hurting someone by not giving a smile or saying a kind word because I'm "not in the mood".
2. Though it wasn't God's plan to have all those babies killed, He knew it was going to happen. Those families had no choice to the circumstance, but they had a choice in their attitude or reaction. Their circumstance could drive them to God or drive them away from God. I really have no clue as to their reactions, but I figure peoplen are much the same across generations and cultures. It was downright not fair for them to lose their babies, but for some reason this is what God allowed. I must remember this when persecution or difficult times come though they are unfair and completely unjust because of an unrighteous person, God has allowed it. The circumstance can drive me to Him or away from Him. The reaction part IS my choice.

2010-12-22T06:30:00.001-08:00

1 peter 1-4
Let your feet and hands do the talking
My mouth is not required to prove that I am a Christian, but it's my testimony that speaks louder than any words I can utter. This is especially true if I suffer wrongfully. Taking a stand doesn't win people over, but acting completely opposite if what they expect does. The key though is not that they are controlling me, but My Father is and everything is unto Him.

2010-12-19T07:13:00.001-08:00

Hebrews 1-6
Forgive me, Lord for getting sleepy while reading. But I do love Hebrews and how it explains your purpose. How everything before was a picture of things to come. The law, the priests, the tabernacles...all of it....proof of Your coming and the completeness of Your sacrifice. It's so plain and clear. Thank You for Thy Word that everreminds me of how wonderful you are.

2010-12-17T06:57:00.001-08:00

Proverbs 17
Whoso rewardeth evil for good, evil shall not depart from his house.
Okay when I first read this I was thinking it said that whoever rewards evil with evil...because I was having a problem with that...but evil for good...I don't think I do that, especially since I'm not a teacher now. :) But it is a good reminder to me now as a Sunday school teacher. Don't reward teenagers that are doing evil with my time and focus when the "low maintenance" kids deserve a little extra love and care.

2010-12-16T06:46:00.001-08:00

2 TIM 1
"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."
Another reminder from you, Lord, not to worry or fear. You've got it all under control. Thank you, Jesus.

2010-12-15T07:19:00.001-08:00

I Timothy 2
"...exercise thyself unto godliness."
Exercise takes work. It's uncomfortable and puts you, but majesty you feel better after. I write this after skipping out in my workout session this morning.:( I can rarely say I look forward to exercising, though I don't really loathe it, but after I've done it, I'm rather glad I did and it makes me proud that I've pushed myself and did what was good for me instead of giving into my fleshly laziness. Such is the case with my path of godliness. I'm always glad after the fact that I've chosen the godly choice, and the more I do it the larger and stronger my spiritual muscles get. Thanks for that reminder today, Lord. I love You!

2010-12-11T22:18:00.001-08:00

Philippians 1-4
The battlefield of the mind
"Be careful for nothing but by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving lets your requests be made known unto God....whatsoever things are true...think on these things..."
Worrying never solves anything. Tell God about it and don't dwell on negative things.

2010-12-09T21:12:00.001-08:00

Ephesians 1-3
Praise Jesus that He destroyed the enmity between me and God! He broke down the wall. By Him I have access to the Father. My little mortal brain can't quite wrap itself around the greatness of that action or the true power of Your sacrifice, Jesus!
Thank You for making it all dependent on you, and not by works. Amazing, amazing grace! I had never paid attention to that verse before about You breaking down the middle wall or the partition. I think I will dwell on that more.

2010-12-08T20:47:00.001-08:00

Galatians 6-9 ?
Paul was talking to the Galatians about how you are either lead of the Spirit or if the flesh. They are walking in complete opposite directions. You can't do both. I am either producing fruits of the Spirit or fruits of the flesh.

2010-12-07T23:24:00.001-08:00

12. Your husband is defined by who he is and not by what he does.
13. Change yourself, that's an easier burden. You cannot change anyone. If you try to do it, it just leaves you frustrated and discouraged. No amount of talking and pleading, and/or nagging will make a difference. Just as God allows circumstances in our life for our own good, I believe He does the same with relationships. They allow us to look at ourselves and let God allow Him to change us. God put my husband on my life because He knew my husband is what I needed to draw me closer to Him.

2010-12-07T22:00:00.001-08:00

Galatians 1-3
Salvation is by faith through grace- not the law! Amen! The law was given to help me realize my need and come to Christ. Thank You Jesus for being my mediator!

2010-12-05T06:29:00.001-08:00

2 Corinthians 4-7
Come out from among them and be ye separate faith the Lord. I shouldn't look or act like the world. There should be an obvious difference because I am a child of God, and since He died for me the least I can do is live for Him.
Godly sorrow worketh repentance unto salvation. Worldly sorrow worketh death. When I feel sorry for ways I've hurt the Lord, it makes me better.
My abundance should be given toward those that lack. It's an unspeakable gift that God had given me. To be able to help others and then they help others too. It's not a welfare system. But it's everyone helping each other in the church. Lord, giving is one area that I need to be more liberal in for sure. Help me to know that balance of providing our needs then also giving toward others in need.

2010-12-04T22:08:00.001-08:00

2 Corinthians 1-3
My suffering is so I cam know the consolation of Christ and then to ne able to help someone else.
Paul encouraged the Corinthians to forgive. He said it wad necessary because he knew unforgiveness is one of Satan's greatest devices.
In the Old Testament when Moses received the law from God, his face shown so brightly he had to wear a bail when he spoke to the people. If God's written law made that big of an effect, how much more should His word living in me cause me to glow too. I didn't shine very brightly today, Lord. Please forgive me. Your word wasn't reflected very well because I did light the candle in my heart this morning. I need You, Lord. I can't do it on my own. I love You!

2010-11-28T05:57:00.005-08:00

On myself and pleasing You.

2010-11-28T05:57:00.003-08:00

2010-11-28T05:57:00.001-08:00

Romans 14-16
My Dangerous Potential Pitfall

Paul reminds the Romans of the importance of not judging other men and their actions like eating meat, etc. Each one does it into the Lord. Each one is us just give an account unto the Lord. Our actions though must not be a stumblingblock for others also. So often I can get caught up in how people behave as far as dress, celebrations, etc, but as Your Word says..."the kingdom of God is not in meat and drink but of righteousness, joy and peace. My mental energy us much more well spent and pleasing to when I focus

2010-11-26T21:11:00.001-08:00

Romans 8-11
Two options
carnally minded or spiritually minded
live after the flesh or live after the Spirit
I was thinking about myself and reflected to see if I am spiritually minded or more carnally minded and realizing that I can't be both or in the middle, but yet I can't dat say that I'm completely spiritually minded all the time or vice versa. Then I realized that what it is talking about is every action and thought. When I eat more than I should I am living after the flesh. When I choose to play a game instead if read my Bible- carnal. But when I consciously choose to do what the Holy Spirit says, I'm living after Him. I must admit its tough business to do that. But thats why I need Him so much. You would think that constantly being into subjection to Him would be bondage, but quite the contrary. It's life and peace.
So I want to have more Spirit led moments instead of flesh led moments in a day, an hour, a minute for that matter.

2010-11-21T11:46:00.001-08:00

Acts 21-23
Paul is urgent to go to Jerusalem though many if his friends implore him not to for fear that he will be bound by them. Paul responds by saying not only is he ready to be bound but even to die in Jerusalem. What determination! He is ei focused on what God has called him to do, the dangers are irrelevant.
Paul does go to Jerusalem and does end up being imprisoned and if not for him being a Roman, he would have been killed.
Paul didn't care about offending people. He cared mire about spreading the Truth and telling his testimony.
It is often through trials and injustice that a Christian voice is loudest and most effective.
Paul has certainly challenged me to be more bold and resolved to do what He's called me to do.

2010-11-20T23:21:00.001-08:00

Hello again all you faithful readers of my blog. LOL yeah I'm sure there's lots.
Where have I been you asked? Well I guess I just found another avenue fit journaling for a bit. I actually kinda like the variety. It keeps things interesting. Since I've been reading my Bible more in the nighttime lately, I thought I would go back to blogging. It helps me to force me to think s little harder on what I have read. Besides, if I can stay awake to play scrabble on my phone, I can certainly blog and meditate on God's awesome word.
Tonight I read in Acts, and it's truly amazing thinking snout what Paul went through. His life was certainly no walk in the park. He was constantly under attack and facing major confrontations. He had so much boldness it's convicting! Every move he made he was always trying to make sure that's where God wanted him.
Me too, I should have that urgent sense of who and where God wants me.

Miracles of Jesus: Calming the sea

2009-11-13T06:54:00.000-08:00

Mark 4-5

Jesus is so facinating to me as a person, and like the disciples felt sometimes, a little confusing. I've gone through a few miracles already, but with the ones I have remaining I am going to kind of outline them. The reactions of the people and to Jesus are all unique.

Miracle: Calming the Sea

Who: The Disciples

Where: Sea (not sure of exact sea in this account)

What Happened: Jesus and the disciples got into a ship before leaving Jesus said "Let us pass over unto the other side." Jesus is asleep in the back on a ship on a pillow and a great storm arises with a surety of shipwreck. The disciples awake him and say "carest not that we perish?" Jesus wakes us and rebukes the wind with "Peace, be still". The wind ceases.

Faith factor: None/ Jesus says to them, "Why ar ye so fearful? how is it that ye have no faith?"

Disciples' Response: Feared exceedingly that the winds and sea obey him.

Jesus' Response: none

Prayer and Faith

2009-10-27T06:59:00.000-07:00

Matthew 3, Mark 1, Luke 3

I admit...I am not great at praying, in fact, to be honest, probably my greatest sin is prayerlessness. I don't know why I struggle with it so much. Is it laziness to put the time aside? Is it that I don't believe my prayers will get answered? It is because I don't want to really do it? I don't know. But I am constantly searching for truths about prayer. To me, prayer is such a fine balance of acceptance of God's will and boldness of faith that it will happen. I don't know if I can quite put it into words, but what I mean is, that I know God answers prayer; I know He can answer prayer, but I also know that sometimes my requests are not His will, so He will not answer it the way that I want---not because I don't have faith, but because His will is perfect. So, I guess, sometimes I hesitate to ask or beseech Him because I know He will ultimately do what is best. But maybe that is my job....to seek Him, ask Him, and then His will is done.

I see an example of prayer here in Mark 1 when a leper comes to him...

1:40 And there came a leper to him, beseeching him, and kneeling down to him, and saying unto him, if thou wilt, thou canst make me clean. And Jesus moved with compassion, put forth his hand, and touched him, and saith unto him, I will; be thou clean.

What if that leper would have never kneeled down and asked? He may have never been healed, even though Jesus was fully able to. I am sure there were other lepers that were never healed because they never asked.

I see the leper's sense of prayer...he kneeled down; he was humble. Beseeching him. To me that is different than just asking...it's an urgent plea.

His words are so important "If thou WILST, thou CANST make me clean." If it's Your will, I know You can, Jesus.

So things, I've learned from this leper about prayer...

1. I need to ask (pray).

2. I need to be humble.

3. I need to be urgent about it.

4. I need to acknowledge His will is best.

5. I need to have faith that He can!

Thank You, Abba, for teaching me this since it was just yesterday that I was discussing the struggle I was having with prayer and faith.

The Right Time

2009-10-26T20:46:00.001-07:00

Matthew 2

I just read about how the wise men came to see Jesus after his birth. Through the wise men, King Herod heard about Jesus and sought to destroy him, so an angel told Joseph to take his family and go to Egypt until Herod's death, so that Jesus' life would be spared from Herod's destruction.

Holy Spirit, You called to my attention of wondering why didn't God let Jesus die then? He was still perfect at that time...a seeming satisfying perfect, undeserving sacrifice to pay for our sins as was required. A few reasons came to mind...

1. There were still prophesies to be fulfilled. The pieces of the puzzle had to all be put together about who the Messiah was that God talked about so often in the Old Testament.

2. Even Jesus was chosen to go through trials to make Your will done...then it should be no surprise when my life is the same.

3. All the miracles would have never been done...He wouldn't have touched the lives He did. While I enjoy the journey and sometimes endure what life has in store for me, I may be here to help someone along the way.

4. The fellowship of His suffering wouldn't be real if He would have never endured the things He did. Because He went through a lot, I know He understands when I go through things too.

Abba your timing is always so perfect...always right on time...and to EVERYTHING there is a purpose...a plan. Thank You. I love You, Abba!

How To Face Critics

2009-10-20T05:37:00.000-07:00

Nehemiah 1-7

Poor Nehemiah, he was just trying to do right by rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem and helping to solve the injustice that was happening inside those gates. You would think that everyone would be praising him for his good deeds, but instead from some he faced criticism. Those fools Sanballat and Tobiah tried everything they could to get him to stop working.

1. First, they mocked him to his face.

2:19 But when Sanballat the Horonite, and Tobiah the servant, the Ammonite, and Geshem the Arabian heard it, they laughed us to scorn, and despised us, and said, What is this thing that ye do? will ye rebel against the king?

Nehemiah's reaction: Boldness of God's Presence and His Enemies Worth

2:20 Then answered I them, and said unto them, The God of heaven, he will prosper us; therefore we his servants will rise and build: but ye have no portion, nor right, nor memorial, in Jerusalem.
Hahahaha, I love it! Nehemiah put those fools in their place! "God's with us, his servants, and not you...now leave me alone!"

2. They mocked him behind his back.

4:1-3 But it came to pass, that when Sanballat heard that we builded the wall, he was wroth, and took great indignation, and mocked the Jews. And the spake before his brethren and the army of Samaria, and said, What do these feeble Jews? will they fortify themselves? will they sacrifice? will they make and end in a day? will they revive the stones out of heaps of the rubbish which are burned? Now Tobiah the Ammonite was by him, and he said, Even that which they build, if a fox go up, he shall even break down their stone wall.

Nehemiah's reaction: Prayer that God Would Take Care of Them

4:4 Hear, O our God; for we are despised: and turn their reproach upon their own head, and give them for a prey in the land of captivity: And cover not their iniquity, and let not their sin be blotted out from before thee: for they have provoked thee to anger before the builders.

He just took it to God and asked Him to take care of them.

3. They planned physical attack.

4:8 And conspired all of them together to come and to fight against Jerusalem, and to hinder it.
Nehemiah's reaction: Prayed again, prepared to defend themselves, and encouraged his followers.

4:9 Nevertheless we made our prayer unto our God, and set a watch against them day and night because of them.

Nehemiah was prepared for a fight, and even had to stop for a little bit to defend themselves against these people. He reminded the Jews who was fighting for them and who they were fighting for.

4:14 "Be not ye afraid of them: remember the Lord, which is great and terrible, and fight for your brethren, your sons, and your daughters, your wives, and your houses.

The enemies found out that their plans were known, so they couldn't surprise attack them like they planned, but Nehemiah and the builders continued the work...a hammer in one hand and a weapon in the other...always ready for a fight.

4. They tried the "buddy" approach.

6:2 ...let us meet together in some one of the villages in the plain of Ono. But they thought to do me mischief.

Nehemiah's reaction: Remembered they were the enemies and continued working

6:3 And I sent messengers unto them, saying, I am doing a great work, so that I cannot come down: why should the work cease, whilst I leave it, and come down to you? Yet they sent unto me four times after his sort; and I answered them after the same manner.

Nehemiah still continued working away and wouldn't be fooled by their antics.

5. They made up lies about him.

6:6 It is reported among the heathen....that thou and the Jews think to rebel: for which cause thou buildest the wall, that thou mayest be their king, according to these words.

Nehemiah's reaction: He called him out.

6:8 There are no such things done as thou sayest, but thou feignest them out of thine own heart

I think what I learn the most out of all this is that critics....are constant and they will constantly try to play on my emotions. But my work and mission (whatever it may be) is not decided on emotion, so therefore it cannot be swayed by emotion (fear, anger, jealousy, etc.). Nehemiah wouldn't have been able to stand against his critics if he wasn't sure that God had sent him to do the work. So actually it wasn't Nehemiah's reaction that was so important (other than I see that he never had an emotional reaction); it was his providence. He knew what God wanted him to do, and no matter what challenges he faced or critics he had to stand against; it did not waiver him.
Critics are sure to come when I try to do something for the Lord. Whether it's principles in which I have in raising children, how I dress, how I spend my time, etc. I must not let my critics play into my emotions. Emotions didn't cause me to believe what I believe so therefore emotions should not cause me to stop!

Bunch of Dimwits!

2009-10-15T05:55:00.000-07:00

Haggai

The prophet Haggai is talking to the governor of Judah, and to Joshua, the son of the high priest. The temple of the Lord had been destroyed by the Babylonians. Now it was time to rebuild it. I guess the people of Judah were saying, "It's not time to build the Lord's house."

Haggai reminds them of the low estate they have put themselves into...
1:5-6 Now therefore thus said the Lord of hosts; Consider your ways. Ye have sown much, and bring in little; ye eat, but ye have not enough; ye drink, but ye are not filled with drink; ye clothe you, but there is none warm; and he that earneth wages earneth wages [to put in] into a bag with holes.

In other words, "Hey you, Dimwits! The path you're headed down isn't working for you! Why not try obeying the Lord and quit putting it off!"

The spirits of these men that Haggai spoke with were stirred up and all the people, so they decided to build the house of the Lord.

At the end God reminds them of where they were before...the trials they endured and the troubles because of their disobedience. But He also promises that He with be with them and will conquer the kingdoms of the heathen if they continue to obey.

At first, I must admit, I get out my pointer finger and think of all THOSE PEOPLE who are SO stupid and keep bucking against the Lord and keep putting off doing right. I look at them and see their lives in ruin and waste and common sense wants to scream at them and say, "You Dimwit! Obviously the direction you are taking isn't working out so well! Why not live for the LORD!!" (Whew! That felt kinda good to get that off my chest!)

But I have really tried to not so much focus on what other people's faults are as I read the Bible this year, but to look inside myself. What sort of "dimwit" things am I doing? The people of Judah were "waiting" to obey, probably wanting for things to be convenient before they obeyed. Never gonna happen! I think of the times that I thought, "If I had my own little quiet spot and a nice comfy chair, I would pray more." Let me testify, that's not true. (I've played that game.) If I won't obey and do the things I know to do when it's not convenient; I won't do it when it is. "Oh, if I had lots of money, I could save it and get ahead." Nope! (I have since learned from that last one, and doing so much better thanks to the principles on money in Your Word.)

Excuse me while I stir myself up, "Bridgett, quit making excuses and do those things you know to do! Obey God. You know when you do it, it always makes things a lot easier! Pray more consistently, Bridgett. Obey the Holy Spirit right away when He prompts you to witness to someone. Shut your mouth when you have a negative thought in your head. Let encouraging words flow freely from your lips and quit being stingy with them."

Ahh... that felt good. The best part of it all, that when I obey Him---I get to enjoy His presence and blessing. And that feels soooooo much better than going my way and being on my own.

2009-10-09T20:08:00.001-07:00

Prov 8:36 "But he that sinneth against me wrongeth his own soul: all they that hate me love death."
Self-inflicting wounds...that's what I think of when I read this verse. Self-bondage...masochistic (had to look up how to spell that one. :) ) christians.
It seems silly to choose to do wrong, I am not just hurting my heavenly Father and rgose around me, but truly I am hurting myself.

2009-10-09T06:51:00.001-07:00

Ezek 41-46
Lots of proof in these scriptures that God believes in order and having a plan. Every measurement of the temple was exact and the requirements for the holiness of the priests were exact too. Why? I figure because everything stood for something. The sacrifices were pictures of Jesus and his perfection...a bad picture would mar the true meaning.
I think of that in my own life...I am supposed to be a little picture of Jesus...ouch! Sometimes I don't do so well. My lack of compassion, my prayerlessness certainly don't represent Him well. Abba, forgive me for falling behind so bad this month on my Bible meditating. Even though the reading of Ezekiel can seem boring an uninspiring at times...if I just think and meditate like today, I can certainly get something challenging from Your word. I love You, Abba!

2009-10-03T05:50:00.001-07:00

Ezekiel 21-22
It's obvious God, that with You things are black and white. So often we try to grey the lonesd lines of right and wrong. This is so against Your character. The priests of Israel were being destroyed because they put no difference between the holy and profane...the clean and the unclean. I was just thinking that it didn't explain their reasons for doing that, so I guess truth be told that it matters not that if I am trying to "reach out" to someone by being like them...there should be a distinct difference between a saved and unsaved person. Not just in my dress, but also in my attitude (ouch need that conviction) and in my spirit. Abba thats what I am going to focus on today. Help me to have an obvious difference in my attitude as a saved person today. The joy of the LORD is my strength!

2009-09-27T20:15:00.001-07:00

Jer 51-52
The destruction of judah by babylon. Gret detail was given on how they destroyed the temple. I think of all the labor and riches that went into it. How sad it must have been to see it torn to pieces! Sadly though they were warned..they had long forsaken, you whom the temple was built for. I think of how it relates to our body the temple. Its no wonder our bodies are destroyed when we forsake you who keeps us clean and from destruction.
By the same token i was encouraged by this telling of history. I am so glad you weren't destroyed when the temple was. You are still alive and reign. You are some lifeless statue or building--you are a real living saviour! And when i do find my temple in need of repairs, you can help me.

2009-09-08T21:58:00.001-07:00

Jer 6-9
Abba You are the King of metaphors...literally. LOL I noticed some great ones tonight while reading. "Break up your fallow gorund" Whata perfect pictire of our hearts. I think of my garden (actually it's more of a weed bed) it's pretty dispicable. It's so overgrown with weeds...it really needs an overhaul of the ground broken up. It's a breeding ground for weeds due to the root system its lavished underneath the soil. If I tried to plant something nre to grow, I'm sure the weeds would choke it out. So true with my christian life. I can try to implement something good, but if my heart is not prepared to "grow" it--little cahnce there will be of it taking root. Abba help me to weed out and clean up to put good things in.
Another metaphor kinda similar "circumcize the foreskin of your heart". I understand now why circumcision was important in the life of the Jew. It was a picture to say he was open and clean. Foreskin I think of as a barrier...a coating that keeps things out, but it should not be that way with my heart and the Lord. Abba, here is my heart...take it help it to be open and receptive of whatever You want.

I Have Seen Thy Tears

2009-09-02T09:06:00.000-07:00

Oh man! I have so much that I have learned in the last few days from Bible reading and circumstances that I feel like my cup is so full that I must spill it out before I can gather more to fill it. :)
Yesterday, a friend was relaying her excitement about the LORD opening up and unexpected door after it seemingly seemed that all doors were closed. She was content and at peace with the doors being shut, though, if that was God's will. It so reminded me of the many times You did that for me, LORD. I was searching, searching, and searching trying to find Your will (well actually Your will than conveniently coincided with what I wanted to be Your will). I would always have a "worst door" situation that I didn't want to go through, but it wasn't until I had completely surrendered to going through that "worst door" that You then showed me what You wanted and often it ended up being what I wanted in the first place. It reminds me of the story of Abraham surrendering Issac. He was willing to do the "worst" to show his obedience and love for You, but it wasn't Issac that You wanted. You wanted to see in action Abraham's heart of obedience and strong devotion. I was trying to remember all the times I was put in the "worst door" dilemma...when I was deciding to stay or go after graduation, when I decided to come home after being in Indiana, when You showed me who I was going to marry. Abba, help m ealways to be open to the "worst door" situation to show that I still love You and that I still believe that You are in control.

Next overflowing...Hezekiah...I was so impressed when I was reading about him last night. It's amazing how he had Your ear God. He was told he was going to die by Isaiah the prophet. After he left the room it says that Hezekiah cried and prayed to You and before Isaiah could even leave the house You tell Isaiah
2 Kings 20:5
Turn again, and tell Hezekiah the captain of my people, Thus saith the LORD, the God of David thy father, I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee:..

Wow! What a quick answer to prayer, but I also love the way this shows how personal You are. "I have seen thy tears." God, that's comforting to know that You see me cry. To know some one has tears down their face, You have to stare at them. You have to watch them for some time to even notice. Abba, thank You for not only seeing my tears like Hezekiah but also "hearing" and responding to my tears. You are so gentle and so kind. I love You so much!!

2009-08-30T13:53:00.001-07:00

Isaiah 54-58
Ouch this was a convicting one today. Really made me look at myself and wonder what my real motives are. God spoke of the children of Israel and the fact that they fasted--they even "seeked Him daily and his ordinances" the Bible says, but God knew their motives. It was for "their pleasure". It was a fast to get what they wanted...not a fast of repentance or a fast doing good will to others. Even their works on the sabbath...not for others but just to fulfill their own desires.
Abba, forgive me for so often being guilty of the same thing. I am so used to "the routine of doing good" that often my motives aren't pure and my heart is caught seeking my own desires. Help me to change. Help me to have a conscious awareness of my motives for all I do--even if it is part of a routine.

2009-08-29T05:44:00.001-07:00

Ok....I changed my mind. I love reading the book of Isaiah, atleast the latter chapters for sure. First of all I love all the references that prove how God formed me and made me even before I was in the womb. I know that God created me for a specific purpose. Secondly I am reminded of how much He cares for me...He's not just my creator, Father but He's my Daddy..my Abba. He holds me, He leads me, He "has graven me upon the palm of his hand". Wow! He loves me. Thirdly, Iam reminded of the awesomeness of his sacrifice...He bore the iniquities of all, chastised for our peace. I had to dwell on that for awhile...iniquities of all...i can think of some pretty vile sins that men have committed and been put in prison or killed for and then theres all those "little sins" of everyone throughout time. What a weight! What a burden! But You did it Lord and I am so thankful. Help me LORD today to show my gratitude by sharing that gift with someone else. I love You, Abba!

Are You Thirsty?

2009-08-28T05:04:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 44-48

44:3 For I will pour my spirit upon him that is thirsty, and floods upon the dry ground: I will pour my spirit upon thy seed, and my blessing upon thine offspring:

I heard this verse in college often. I am reminded of how there must be someone that is thirsty to receive the spirit or a dry ground for there to be refreshment. Sometimes I get so full of the world or other things that honestly I'm not really that thirsty. I'm not dry and longing for refreshment. I think that's a hard balance in the Christian life...learning to constantly weed out the distractions so that your life can be empty long enough for Jesus to fill it.
Abba help me to be really thirsty. I know that sometimes means bringing trials into my life to where I find myself thirsty, but I would much rather have a trial and Your spirit rather than an empty, dry barren life that shows no reflection of You.

45:10-11 Woe unto him that striveth with his Maker! Let the potsherd strive with the potsherds of the earth. Shall the clay say to him that fashioneth it, What makest thou? or thy work, He hath no hands? Woe unto him that saith unto his father, What begettest thou? or the to the woman, What hast though brought forth?

Acceptance. I have no control over the way I was born, the family I was born into, but what I can do is accept it. Abba, thank You for teaching me this early on in life and not living with the "victim" syndrome all my life. You designed everything for a reason and for a purpose. Thank You.

48:21 And they thirsted not when he led them through the deserts: he caused the waters to flow out of the rock for them: he clave the rock also, and the waters gushed out. There is no peace, saith the LORD, unto the wicked.

Funny how this verse says what I was thinking earlier...You bring us through trials to make us thirsty. Sad though how the children of Israel were brought through the trial but yet it still didn't make them thirsty. I've seen that in people's lives sometimes. Trials make them bitter instead of better. Instead of turning to God they turn against God. Oh LORD, help me never to do that. Strike me dead before I hurt Your precious name. I don't want to leave a legacy like that. As You said, there is no peace to the wicked.

To sum today's reading up....Help me to be thirsty by accepting what You have brought into my life and turn to You the quench that thirst. I love You, Abba.

God's Hands

2009-08-27T05:16:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 41-43

41:10 Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.

To me, the right hand is always a picture of the strongest side---the best side. God upholding me with His right hand tells me that He is right there (literally...LOL) and is giving His best side to me to hold me up.

He assures me again...
41:13 For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.

Obviously if He is holding my right hand, I am now on His left side meaning to me that God is all around me. His right hand holding me...Him holding my right hand.

This verse cracked me up...
41:13 Fear not, thou worm Jacob, and ye men of Israel; I will help thee, saith the LORD, and thy redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.

I don't know what spiritual application I am supposed to get from that, but it makes me laugh that You, Lord, called them a worm and then promised to help them. Makes me think of a mom saying, "Quit whining you, brat, here's your lunch." Maybe it helps me to know that sometimes God gets "fed up" too. Well, maybe there is a more spiritual word for "fed up" but I can't think of one. :)

43:2 When thou passest through the water, I will be with thee; and through the river, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flames kindle upon thee.

In this verse, God doesn't promise me that I won't go through the waters and fires, but that when I do, they shall not overwhelm me or destroy me. Trials are sure to come, problems, burdens inevitably come, but they are only to make God's presence more real to me.

I think also of Psalm 13 where it says "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for thou are with me"

Sure, I feel close to my husband when we are walking side by side on a breezy beautiful day, but it's when we are in the midst of trouble and he holds me and assures me that everything will be okay that I feel the closest to him. Such is the same with my wonderful Saviour.

43:7 Even everyone that is called by my name: for I have created him for my glory, I have formed him; yea, I have made him.

Wow!! To really think about that...I wasn't just a mass production from God. He formed me. Every little detail He decided. Like piece of clay wielded in the potter's hand. All for His glory. I've never been one of those that hates this or that about my body, I guess, I'm pretty content with the way that I was made, but when I do despise those moles :) I can remember they are God's thumbprint on me. :)

All these verses beautifully tie together in helping me to understand the work of Your hands, LORD. They hold me, they help me, and they form me. What a reassuring thought to know that Your hands continue to hold and guide me even today. LORD, help me to be aware of Your hand and willing to hold it to lead me today. I love You, Abba.

Steady Words, Sweet Embraces & Unwaivering Strength

2009-08-26T05:02:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 40-43

40:7 "The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand forever."

I've memorized and have heard that verse a thousand times, as I read it, though, I am extremely thankful for the unchangingness of Your word, LORD. In this world that changes its opinion and standard constantly---a society that allows time to erode away principles, I am so thankful for a Bible that is constant. A standard that I can always turn to that NEVER changes. Maybe I appreciate that more and more the older I get as I see people and society constantly changing.

40:11 "He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lanmbs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young."

I love the picture that this gives me of You. LORD--Your gentle embrace and loving hand to guide. "Carry them in his bosom" that's the most personal and intimate embraces anyone can give--the ultimate display of love and protection. Thank you, Abba.

40:28-31 Hast thou not known? hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, niether is weary? there is no searching of his understanding. He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

You, LORD, are the ultimate source of strength. Trying to get my mind to comprehend all that You do just tires me to even think about it, but yet You don't tire--You don't faint. God help me to remember the times that when I am weary and tired whether it be physically, emotionally or mentally that You are strength that if I trust in You and Your power, I can run again.

2009-08-23T07:02:00.001-07:00

Isaiah 31-34
I don't see how anyone can read the book of Isaiah and not umderstand that God is love and because of that He is also a God of wrath. His justice cannot allow sin to continue without consequences.

Playing the Harlot

2009-08-20T09:24:00.000-07:00

Hosea

I get so mad at Israel for making the LORD so sad and angry! How could they turn their back on God and play the harlot by worshipping other gods instead of Him? How could they not fail to see the goodness of God and choose Him after all the miracles He had done for them.
They tried to cover up their sin with good works, burnt sacrifices, and such but God knew their hearts--it was all a facade. He knew the truth. In fact, it made Him sick that they would act like nothing was wrong with their lifestyles.
I see America as an adulterous Israel nowadays. We forget what You have done. We forget the Biblical foundation that was laid in creating this nation. We love our gods of materialism, humanism, & entertainment. We're self-centered and vain. Our number one priority is ourselves. Adultery is commonplace and a mockery. We no longer see our sin as sin. We go on doing our "good works" while You're up in heaven puking at the repulsiveness of its phoniness.
This verse stood out to me...

6:6 For I desired mercy, and not sacrifice; and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings.

Why would God desire mercy? What does He need to be forgiven of? Nothing. He desires to see me show mercy to others. Mercy is a sign that I care about others; it's not about me. Sacrifice can be an outward show of what I'm willing to "give up" and sometimes can cause the focus to be on me. That's why I think He says the same about the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings. Sacrifices/ offerings are outward displays. Mercy/ knowledge of God are inward.
Abba, I know I probably sound redundant at times, but please help me to keep the inward clean. Keep it real. I know You despise fakes--I don't want to be that. Forgive me, Lord. Help me to constantly be focused on You throughout the ENTIRE day not just for my morning devotion time but continually. I want to know You. I want You to be a part of every aspect and decision of my life. Help me to notice and acknowlege Your convinction and to be willing to change. I love you, Abba. Thank You for always being so patient with me.

Are You a Just a Piece of China?

2009-08-19T03:56:00.000-07:00

2 Kings 18, 2 Chron 29-31, Psalms 48

Hezekiah is now king and what a great testimony he had:
18:5-6 He trusted in the LORD God of Israel; so that after him was none like him among all the kings of Judah, nor any that were before him. For he clave to the LORD, and departed not from following him, but kept his commandments...

Clave...such a descriptive word. Makes me picture someone clinging onto someone and refusing to let go. Almost like when someone is clutching onto someone when their life is danger.

When Hezekiah began to reign he knew it was time to "clean house."
29:5 And he said unto them, Hear me, ye Levites, santify now yourselves and santify the house of the LORD God of your fathers, and carry forth the filthiness out of the holy place. For our fathers have trespassed, and on that which was evil in othe eyes of the LORD our God and have forsaken him, and have turned away their faces from the habitation of the LORD, and turned their backs.

Our bodies are the temple of the LORD and this pictures what I should always be doing to my temple---cleaning house and carrying out the "filthiness". I think I would be more sober about sinning if I would look at my sin as rotten, putrified filth. I think of some of the houses we treat in our pest control business--eck! pure filthiness. How did they get that way? Neglect over time. Ignoring a mess here and there--becoming oblivious to the mess around them that they "adapt" to it. It really is quite disgusting. Abba, help me to cleanse every little "dirty" sin before my temple becomes overrun with "filthiness".
As I was reading, I realize the importance of cleansing the temple. Santification--set apart for another purpose. It wasn't made clean just for the sake of being clean--it was cleaned so it could be used for the LORD. A clean living Christian is of no use if he's not doing for the LORD. It's like the china in my cabinet. Sure it's clean (well there might be some dust on them now) but it's usefulness is not as great as my normal dinnerware. The china is nice to look at, but my normal dinnerware is sanctified! Help me not to just cross my t's, dot my i's and look the part, but also to be USED for the part. Help me to be more of a soul winner and a help to people.

God used Hezekiah to see a great revival wrought in Judah---even in Jerusalem too. They sang in Psalms...
48:14 For this God is our God for ever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death.

The Bible & Vegetables...Worrying

2009-08-17T04:27:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 13-27

Hmmmm...I am confessing my sinfulness; oh how I find little interest in the majority of the book of Isaiah. It's so over my head. Honestly, I am reading through it semi-searching for something, but also just wanting to get through it. It's like that helping of vegetables on your plate. It's not the tastiest thing on the plate, but you know it's good for you and you need it.
So maybe that's part of my lesson. The task of "tasting" all the Bible. But I am grateful that there are a few nuggets here and there that are bursting with "flavor".

Isaiah 26:3-4 Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the LORD for ever: for the LORD JEHOVAH is everlasting strength.

I've memorized verse 3 in the past. How true and good it is. When I get overwhelmed with doubts and worry about this or that, I have to chant this verse to myself. My worry is only proof that I am not trusting in God.
I've never much paid attention to the following verse. Trust in the LORD FOREVER. For ever...that's a long time. :) But how it shows how much I trust in You, LORD. You are everlasting strength. I must be willing to admit myself weak, though, before I can submit and benefit from Your strength.
So, Lord, I cast my burdens upon You today. You know exactly what we should do about the financial matter I was worrying about last night. You have taken care of us already in the past; it seems foolish not to continue to trust in You. Help us to do the right thing, make the right decisions based on Your truth and not our convenience. I love You, Abba, forgive me for worrying and not taking advantage of Your perfect peace by keeping my mind stayed on You.

What Doth the Lord Require of Thee?

2009-08-13T06:37:00.000-07:00

2 Chron 27

27:2 And he (Jotham) did that which was right in the sight of the LORD, according to all that his father Uzziah did: howbeit he entered not into the temple of the LORD. And the people did yet corruptly.

This verse makes me think of how often as a Christian I'm guilty of not doing things ALL the way.

27:6 So Jotham became mighty, because he prepared his ways before the LORD his God.

Goodness! God is so patient with us. Even if we are willing to put God first in only one area of our life, He is willing to bless us.

Isaiah 9-11?, Micah 1-7

I must admit...I get a little lost and confused in the books of prophesy sometimes, but I did find this nugget..

Micah is asking...what shall I bring before a high God...huge offerings? rivers of oil? give my firstborn or the fruit of my body for sin?

6:8 He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?

To do justly---not fairly. I think that our country has forgotten this principle. Everyone deserves the consequence or the reward of his own personal action---fairness says everyone gets the same thing no matter what. Everyone gets a trophy or everyone gets punished in the class because one person did wrong.

To love mercy---ouch! That's a hard one! Oh, it's easy to love the mercy that others extend to me, but to love mercy so much that I extend it to others?

To walk humbly with thy God---With--that's an important word. I think You love it, God, when I walk WITH You. I think of how friends walk together, side by side. Even a father and child, side by side. Humbly beside You realizing how great You truly are, but enjoying Your presence throughout the day.

God's Emotions

2009-08-12T06:44:00.000-07:00

Amos 6-9
The entire book of Amos is about the prophesy of Israel's destruction. As I read through the verses, I see the variety of God's emotions about His children, Israel. He is so grieved by them. Grieved that they turn from Him continually--that they trust in things/men rather than Him. I also find God angry--angry at their two-facedness. He abhors their songs, their offerings, their oblations. It's all vanity---an outward show but no substance inside. He's had it! It wasn't that they weren't "religious" enough. They were doing all the usual traditions, the motions of religion, but their heart was turned away from Him. He prophesies through Amos that He will destroy all of Israel save a remnant as He promised to build the land again.

This time in history makes me reflect on a few things...
1. I am made in Your image. I have and go through the same emotions You do. Having emotions is not wrong, but being controlled by them is. It was not Your anger or grief that made You decide to destroy Israel, but their actions.

2. You despise fakes. Abba, I feel Your pain. LOL It's bad enough someone does wrong, but it's even worse when they try to cover it up with "good" and act as though they've never done anything wrong at all. I think of that verse...
Proverbs 28:13 "He that covereth his sins shall not prosper; but whoso that confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy."
When I've done wrong, I need to admit it, forsake it, and not try to "cover it up" with ritualistic religious practices.

Abba, I think the worse thing would be for You to turn Your back from me---for You to refuse to even hear my prayers. Create in me a clean heart, O God. When my heart is clean and pure before You, I know that pleases You more than anything! I love You, Abba! Thank You for saving me 16 years ago today!!! I am so blessed!!

2009-08-08T07:20:00.001-07:00

Isaiah 1-8
I see how heart-broken You were over Israel--like a wayward child breaks his parents heart.

Signs of Bitterness

2009-08-05T08:03:00.000-07:00

Jonah (Part 2)

This second phase of Jonah's story about going to Ninevah made me see how aptly applies to bittnerness in the Christian life---how we respond when others hurt us.

Jonah did not want to go and preach to Ninevah because this was the very country that had long been an enemy of the Israelittes. I don't know what sort of personal history Jonah had with it, but he obviously had no desire to go and tell them about God's judgment and mercy.

1. My personal feelings toward that person override my obedience to God.
Jonah wanted to run the other direction instead of preach to them.
I think of how this happens with church members sometimes. We would rather disobey God and miss church than be around a person that hurt us.

2. I become angry at God's mercy toward those that have hurt me.
The Bible says that Nineveh repented, so God repented the judgment He was going to bring. Jonah's reaction is
4:1"But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was very angry."
He wasn't just upset, but VERY ANGRY. He even tells God,
4:2 And he prayed unto the LORD, and said, I pray thee, O LORD, was not this my saying, when I was yet in my country? Therefore I fled before Tarshish: for I knew that thou are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repentest thee of evil.
In other words, I knew You'd forgive them God--that's why I didn't want to come and tell them the Truth!
When I have this attitude it's almost like I am tellling God that I deserve the mercy He gave me, but they don't! I must look at my sin to be just as disgusting as theirs. Thou they have hurt me, I have hurt You just as much. You're willing to forgive me for hurting You, so I can accept that You are willing to forgive them too.

3. I throw a pity party.
Jonah whines...
4:3 Therefore, O LORD, take, I beseech thee, my life from me; for it is better for me to die than live.
I don't think Jonah really wanted to die---He just wanted God to feel sorry for him.

4. Anger consumes me and I want to seclude myself.
4:4-5 Then said the LORD, Doest thou well to be angry? So Jonah went out of the city, and sat on the east side of the city, and there made him a booth, and sat under it in the shadow, till he might see what would become of the city.

5. I am unwilling to move on.
Jonah wanted to be alone, and he wanted to sit, soak, and sour about the circumstances. He didn't want to move on, but instead wanted to dwell on it and see what would happen.

6. Things become a temporary distraction to my grief.
God prepared a gourd to grow and shadow Jonah's head. The Bible said he was "exceeding glad of the gourd"

7. I shift my security that was in people to things instead of untimately having security in God.
God used a worm to kill the gourd that Jonah had grown to love and find security in. When it dies, Jonah ends up in the same state he was in before...angry and wishing he would die.

8. My perception of love is totally skewed.
God reprimands Jonah for this. Jonah loved and cared for a gourd that he had nothing to do with..didn't work to make it grow, etc, but yet Jonah expects God not to care for the people of Nineveh whom He had created.

The sad part of this story is that we never see if Jonah turned from his bitterness. I'd like to think that he did. Abba, thank You so much that You have kept me from letting the seed of bitterness grow in my heart. Help me to keep it that way. Help me to see the signs before it overwhelms me and consumes me like it did Jonah.

What Happns When I Backslide?

2009-08-04T07:47:00.000-07:00

Jonah (Part 1)

I won't go into explaining the whole story of Jonah, but I did observe some interesting things...

What Happens When I Backslide?

1. I put others in danger, and they are aware of the problem before I am.
Jonah was as it said fleeing "from the presence of the Lord"--backslidding. God had clearly told him what to do, and he had no intention of following that plan, in fact, he tried to go the exact opposite direction. I find it interesting that during in a severe storm "so that the ship was like to be broken" Jonah is fast asleep---completely oblivious to God's wrath and power.
I think that happens when we backslide sometimes...those around us realized the danger and destruction before we do. They don't understand the cause of it, but they notice something's definitely wrong. But here we are content in our own little world even uncaring that others are in danger because of our wrong choices.

2. I have to admit I have fled from God to others--revealing my stupidity even to the unsaved.
Jonah lets the other sailors know why the storm is happening. I can imagine as he's telling this to them the storm raging as he talking. Waves pounding the ship, the ship rocking to and fro. These sailors are then absolutely amazed that Jonah would flee from God's presence--the one Jonah claimed made the sea and the dry land. Even unsaved people find it very stupid for a Christian to be backslidden.

3. I have to be willing to suffer the consequences of my actions.
The sailors tried every which way to fix the problem logically. Less weight, etc, but Jonah knew the only thing that could calm the storm--he must yield to the consequence. I don't see anywhere in the Bible that shows that he knew he was going to be swallowed by a fish. Perhaps he thought he was just going to die. He probably hoped that was going to be so---better than having to go back to Ninevah.
**Side note: The Bible says of the sailors "Then the men feared the Lord exceedingly..." I think of that verse in Proverbs "Smite the scorner and the simple will beware..." God didn't just punish Jonah for his sake, but for the sailors, too. He took something bad--Jonah's disobedience--and used it for good in these sailors lives.

4. When I'm willing to be truthful, God provides another path--sometimes quite unexpected.
It wasn't until after Jonah was cast in that "the Lord had prepared a great fish to swallow up Jonah". I never noticed before that Jonah said.."the weeds were wrapped about my head", so obviously Jonah was struggling in the water for a while. And until he said "When my soul fainted within me I remembered the Lord: and my prayer came into thee." It's wasn't until he was literally at the rock bottom he remembered God.
This verse jumped out at me too...
2:8 They that observe lying vanities forsake their own mercy.

When I am so wrapped in believing the lies of my own backslidding life, I forfeit mercy. I can never be forgiven if I never admit the truth. I think of that verse "Let not mercy and truth forsake thee" God cannot forgive until the truth comes out.

2009-08-02T20:37:00.001-07:00

I just read about hoe jehu became king. It seems that he was mainly used by god to fulfill the prophesy of what was to happen to the house of ahab and jezebel. All of his sons 70 of them-- their heads chopped off and delivered to Jehu. I can just picture the heaps of heads...quite disgusting and brutal. Jehu also destroys the prophets of Baal by tricking them into coming to a big sacrifice time. He hads his armies kill every last bit of them. But yet the Bible says...that he chose not to put away the sins of

A Mother's Testimony

2009-07-28T06:26:00.000-07:00

1 Chronicles 19-23

After Jehoshaphat was considered a decent king, but later in his life he did join unto them that did wickedly. He dies and his son Jehoram becomes king. I guess, fearing his brethren would try to dethrone him, he "slew them" all. Talk about sincere greed and insecurity! Because of his wicked ways, God promises that a great plague would smite his people, and thy children, and thy wives, and all thy goods. The end of his life is horrible...

21:20 And it came to pass, that in process of time, after the end of two years, his bowels fell out by reason of his sickness: so he died of sore diseases. and his people made no burning for him, like the burning of his fathers.

Doesn't sound like a pleasant way to die if you ask me! Ahaziah now becomes king. I see a sad testament of his mother.

22:3 He also walked in the ways of the house of Ahab: for his mother was his counsellor to do wickedly.

What a horrible mother! Far different from what the Bible instructs to "train them up in the nuture and admonish of the Lord". It wasn't that she just allowed him to do wickedly, but she taught him to do so. Sadly, I see this in my generation. Mothers that train their kids to drink, to lie, to commit fornication. Abba, I know my job as even a step-mom is important. Help my actions, my words to train to do good and not evil.

Not for Sale

2009-07-24T06:45:00.000-07:00

1 Kings 21

Naboth's Vineyard...King Ahab comes to Naboth demanding that he sell his vineyard to him or be willing to trade it for another one better. Naboth refuses because it's a vineyard that was passed down from his family. Ahab mopes like a jealous spoiled child at home to his wife, Jezebel. Jezebel arranges to have Naboth stoned and killed so Ahab can have the vineyard. Because of this Elijah comes to Ahab with a message from God; here's the conversation:

21:20-23 And Ahab said unto Elijah, Hast thou found me, O mine enemy? And he answered, I have found theee: because thou hast sold thyself to work evil in the sight of the LORD. Behold I will bring evil upon thee, and will take away thy posterity, and will cut off from Ahab him that pisseth against the wall, and him that is shut up and left in Israel...and of Jezebel also spake the LORD, saying, The dogs shall eat Jezebel by the wall of Jezreel."

I love that..."O mine enemy"...that shows that Elijah wasn't afraid to tell the truth to anyone, even the king.

As I read this story, I am reminded of a sermon from Bro. Hyles. I call recall him chanting "You can't have it; my father gave it to me! You can't have it! My father gave it to me!" His sermon related to how there are those who are trying to take our Bible, the King James Version, away from us. Trying to give us a "better" version. But just as Naboth was determined not to sell out; so should we have the same stance toward our precious KJV.
Of course, I can relate this to anything that is not for sale---my LORD, my values, my morals, my principles, my family, etc. Though Naboth died for his stance, he went out a hero in my eyes. He believed and stood for something. Help me to do the same, Abba.

After Elijah's declaration, we find Ahab actually humbled himself and God promises...

21:29 Seest thou how Ahab humbleth himself before me? because he humbleth himself before me, I will not bring the evil in his days: but in his son's days will I bring the evil upon his house.
This reminds me, God, of how You are no respector of persons. All you require after we sin or even do evil in this case is that we humble ourselves. You could have refused Ahab humilty seeing what a wicked king he was, but you still extended the same mercy.

Thyself Hast Decided It

2009-07-23T06:12:00.000-07:00

1 Kings 20

Benhadad, king of Syria, has come up against Ahab, king of Israel. He take the best of what Ahab has---silver, gold, wives and children. Then Benhadad comes back and demands that he be allowed to come in and take whatever else he wants. Ahab refuses that and a war ensues. A prophet tells Ahab that he will deliver them into his hand "and thou shalt know that I am the LORD." They do defeat the army, but not Benhadad. He escapes and a year later Benhadad tries to defeat Israel again. Again Israel wins, but Benhadad escapes and hides.
An interesting turn to the story...the servant's of Benhadad say to him

20:31 "And his servants said unto him, Behold, we have heard that the kings of the house of Israel are mericul kings: let us, I pray the, put sackcloth on our loins, and ropes upon our heads, and go out to the king of Israel: peradventure he will save thy life."

As expected, Ahab does extends mercy to Benhadad and makes a covenant with him and sends him away.
In the next verse it describes a son of the prophets asking neighbors to smite him "in the word of the Lord". One disobeys, and a lion kills him for not obeying God's word. Another obeys and smites him to wound him. This wounded prophet disguised waits for king Ahab and tells him a story about how he was commanded to keep a man and not let him go missing and if he did his life would be required for his. The prophet explains that he was busy here and there, and the man went missing. Ahab responds,

20:40 " so shall thy judgment be; thyself hast decided it."

Of course this was all a story to symbolize what Ahab had done. The prophet says..

20:42 And he said unto him, Thus said the LORD, because thous hast let go out of thy hand a man whom I appointed to utter destruction therefore thy life shall go for his life, and thy people for his people.

Observations from this story..
1. God was still willing to fight for Israel, in fact He was still wanting to show Himself to King Ahab although he was a wicked king.
2. Being merciful isn't admirable if it requires me being disobedient.
3. Allowing a small percentage of a battle unwon sometimes causes the whole war to be lost. Abba, what one little area in my life do I keep "letting go out of my hand" that could lead to my destruction? It's often those "pesky" little sins that lead to major destruction later. Help me, as that one song says to "Nip it in the bud." I especially pray for this in my marriage. I know little seeds of bitterness, dishonesty, unfaithfulness can lead to great destruction. Help me to be careful of the relationships/ conversations I have with other men. Help me to forgive quickly and love often. Those words Ahab said really describe it when I choose not to obey completely "so thy judgment be; thyself hast decided it."

What If?

2009-07-21T06:35:00.000-07:00

1 Kings 15, 2 Chron 13-16

Asa is made king over Judah. He drives out the wickedness in his land and turns to the Lord (unlike his father did) He even had a wicked mother, in fact, he removes her from being queen because she built an idol. Asa seeks the Lord's help to deliver them from their enemies. The prophet Azariah tells Asa that God will indeed be with them because they have turned to Him. After hearing this, Asa makes a covenant with his nation to God...

15:12-13 And they entered into a covenant to seek the LORD God of their fathers with all their heart and with all their soul; that whosoever would not seek the LORD God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.

What if there was a convenant made like that in our nation? Yikes! "All their heart...all their soul"...Would I be one of those put to death? So much for half-hearted Christianity. These verses, though, give me hope for America. Judah was wicked! Sodomites were rapant; idolatry was overwhelming; the rulers were vile, but God used Asa as a king to bring revival to this nation. This same nation was later declaring..

15:15 And all Judah rejoiced a tthe oath: for they had sworn with all their heart, and sought him with thier whole desire; and he was found of them: and the LORD gave them rest round about.

What a strong stand! Asa's life sadly, doesn't end on the best note. Later Baasha, king of Israel comes up against Asa. Asa calls on the king of Syria to help him. Asa is later repuked by a seer, Hanani, saying..

16:7-9 And at that time Hanani the seer came to Asa king of Judah, and said unto him, Because thou hast relied on the king of Syria, and not relied on the LORD thy God, therefore is the host of the kind of Syria escaped out of thine hand. Were not the Ethiopians and the Lubims a huge host, with very many chariots and horsemen? yet, because thou didst rely on the LORD, he delivered them into thine hand. For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him. Herein thou hast done foolishly: therfore from henceforth thou shalt have wars."

In other words, "You depended on God before when the battle was tougher, and now you don't. So continue on with wars without God's help."

I wish Asa would have repented and changed his way after the rebuke but instead...

16:10 "Then Asa was wroth with the seer, and put him in a prison house; for he was in a rage with him because of this thing. And Asa oppressed some of the people the same time....And Asa in the thirty and ninth year of his reign was diseased in his feet, until his disease was exceeding great: yet in his disease he sought not to the LORD, but to the physicians."

Abba, what in my life am I relying on others, instead of relying on You? Lord, I want to show Yourself strong on my behalf. Do a work in my life in our specific situation. I must admit, LORD, sometimes this is hard. We seek....well truthfully we just casually ask...You to help us, but then we go to others that we feel You've put in our path to help us. But LORD perhaps the problem is the truly SEEKING part. Help me to do a lot better at that. I love You, Abba.

Knowing What You Believe

2009-07-17T06:14:00.000-07:00

1 Kings 13

Wow! How did I miss this story before? I guess I've skimmed over it before, but I never really paid attention to it, and I don't think I've heard a sermon from it.
A man of God is sent to Jeroboam to let him know that God said Josiah was going to be born and the priests of Jeroboam would be burnt upon the altars Jeroboam built. The man of God says it will be proven with a sign: that altar will be torn apart and ashes will pour from it. Jeroboam is outraged; he lays his hand on the altar basically cursing this man of God. The hand he put on the altar dries up, so that he can not pull in again to him. (Not sure what that exactly entails, but it does sound painfully and freaky.) Then the altar does tear apart and ashes come out. Obviously Jeroboam now sees that this was no joke. He begs the man of God to plead for his hand to be restored. God restores it, and Jeroboam asks the man of God to come home with him and "refresh thyself" and he will give him a reward.
I love this man's answer...

13:8-9"And the man of God said unto the king, If thou wilt give me half of thine house, I will not go in with thee, neither will I eat bread nor drink water in this place: For so was it charged me by the word of the LORD, saying, Eat no bread, nor drink water, nor turn again by the same way that thou camest."

He was confident in what God had told him and despite the bribe--he's wasn't going against that.
An old prophet that lives in Bethel hears about this whole incident and seeks the man of God out and extends the same invitation as Jeroboam did: to stay and eat in his house. Still confident in what God has said, the man of God refuses and tells him what the LORD said. The prophet replies:

13:18 "He said unto him, I am a prophet also as thou art; and an angel spake unto me by the word of the LORD, saying, Bring him back with thee into thine house, that he may eat bread and drink water. But he lied unto him."

Obviously believing him, the man of God follows him to his house. He eats and drinks and there the prophet rebukes him for not obeying the LORD and says "thy carcase shall not come unto the sepulchre of thy fathers." The man of God leaves and during his travels he is attacked by a lion and killed; his carcase left on the side of the road. The old prophet hears of the news and brings the prophet back and buries his body in his own sepulchre and asks his sons to bury him beside the man of God when he dies, too. The prophet realizes what the man of God said to Jeroboam is indeed true. And the Bible says...

13:33-34 "After this thing Jeroboam returned not from his evil way, but made again the lowest of the poeple priests of the hight places: whosoever would, he consecrated him, and he became on of the priests of the high places. And this thing became sine unt the house of Jereboam, even to cut it off, and to destroy it from off the face of the earth."

So many thoughts...
1. Have courage and be strong in what God tells you like this man of God was initially.
2. Though he had courage, sadly, the devil used confusion to side-track him. Satan knew he couldn't be bribed, but he knew he could confuse him with a seemingly trusted source. I'm not sure why the Bible makes sure to tell us he was an "old prophet". Maybe he used to preach and had backslidden; obviously he wasn't living completely right because he lied.
I think Satan still tries this trick on sincere Christians today. So often we take "God's word" from someone else instead of knowing it ourselves. Or we know God's word suredly, but when a seemingly sincere Christian offers a suggestion that is against what we know to be God's word and appeases us, we follow their words instead. I'm sure this man of God was hungry and thirsty and maybe even longed for some fellowship with another "man of God". Abba, help me to KNOW Your commandments and STICK to them even when others I respect may tell me otherwise. I think of what Paul warned the early Christians...

Gal 1:6-8 "I marvel that ye are so soon removed from him that called you into the grace of Christ unto another gospel: Which is not another; but there be some that trouble you, and would pervert the gospel of Christ. But though we, or an angel form heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed."

I've got to KNOW what the BIBLE says, and not waiver from it despite what even good Christians may otherwise say.

3. God is not a respector of persons. He brings judgment on the just and unjust. The word of GOD was fulfilled just as surely for the good Christian who disobeys as it is for the ungodly man that disobeys.
4. Perhaps this whole incident from the man of God was for the "old prophet". Maybe he doubted God's true judgment and decided he would "try" God out. He certainly found that God's word is true and sure judgment would come. I look forward to meeting him in heaven one day to see how his life changed after that. So, sometimes God uses good Christians, to help doubting Christians to believe again.

Leadership, God's Cause, and Traditions

2009-07-16T06:41:00.000-07:00

1 Kings 12-14

Rehoboam is now king. Jeroboam and the congregation of Israel request that he make the yoke lighter than what Solomon made it on the people.
Just thinking...I wonder what Solomon did to make things so grievous for them. Maybe it was the building of the temple that wearied them? Back to the story...
Rehoboam, wisely, first consults the old men, and they tell Rehoboam...

12:7 "If thou wilt be a servant unto this poeple this day, and wilt serve them, and answer them, and speak good words to them, then they wil be thy servants for ever."

So true, in leadership...the way to be a great leader is to be a great servant. Obviously, Rehoboam didn't like that answer. He wanted to feel powerful and to be mighty king, not a lowly servant, so the counsel of his friends catered more along of what he was thinking...

12:10-11 "And the young men that were grown up with him spake unto him, saying, Thus shalt thous speak unto this people that spake unto thee, saying, Thy father made our yoke heavy, but make thou it lighter unto us; thus shalt thou say unto them, My little finger shall be thicker than my father's loins. And no whereas my father did lade you with a heavy yoke, I will add to your yoke: my father chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions."

Whoa! That's pretty severe! That declaration is filled with so much hatred and oppression. Rehoboam forgot where he came from. He forgot that his job was to serve His people as king. Abba, help me to realize my greatest influence is gained as a leader when I love people and serve them---not oppress them.
Lord, though, this was prophesied. Oppression was sure to come to Israel because Solomon followed those strange women and their gods. His sin brought punishment onto more than just himself.

12:15 "Wherefore the king hearkened not unto the people; for the cause was from the Lord..."

The kingdoms now become divided. Only the tribe of Judah remains with Rehoboam. The rest follow Jereboam as a king. Rehoboam plots to fight against Jeroboam, but the man of God with counsel from God stops them.
The time of sacrifice is coming near when the Israelittes travel to Jerusalem, Jeroboam fears that his followers will go back to the house of David, Jerusalem, and not follow him any more, but go back to Rehoboam and kill Jeroboam. His fear makes him decide to make two golden calves for them to worship in Shechem instead of returning to worship God in Jerusalem. Another example of pride and desire for power of a king.
This also is a good example of the verse

Mark 7:13 "Making the word of God of none effect through your tradition, which ye have delivered; and many such like things do ye."

The people were wrapped up in the tradition of sacrifice, but forgot the purpose, the meaning of the sacrifice-a picture of the Saviour to come.

So much good stuff just from Chapter 12. I think I will stop there for today.
1. Lead with an attitude of servitude.
2. You often ordain oppression from leaders because of the sins of the previous generation.
3. Know why I do what I do--to make the word of God effective. Don't fall into the trap of doing things just for the sake of tradition, otherwise, it will eventually lose it's purpose.

God's Longsuffering

2009-07-14T06:43:00.000-07:00

A lot is on my mind today with one of my family members. It's really difficult to see someone struggle when they don't have to. You see the bad choices they continually make...continuing to go down that path of destruction. Then when almost destruction comes they come to you asking for help---not "Help, I've made some bad choices; I need to make some changes." But rather "Help me just temporarily, I'll make it somehow." I want to teach them. I want to help them understand what they are doing wrong, but they don't want to hear. They don't want to hear that the way they've been doing it all this time isn't right.

Abba, how incredibly frustrated You must get with me sometimes. How often am I guilty of the same thing. I'm doing things my own way and then I ask You to "bail me out." How many times do I continually make poor choices, especially with my time, and You know that if I would just follow my schedule of spending time with You and doing the work I am supposed to do...the day would go so much better, and I wouldn't have that feeling of remorse. Or how many times I fail to pray...You know, REALLY pray and instead I chose to watch TV. Abba, You have made me understand more and more how much I grieve Your heart as Your child when I feel the grief my family can cause me. Things seem so obvious to me of things they need to "fix." I think it must be that way with You. You see so many things I should just "fix" and things would certainly go a lot smoother.
On that note....You gave me a great verse today...

Proverbs 31:27-28 "She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Her children arise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her."

God, I want that to be my testimony. But that means that often I will have to do "What I don't want to do." I will have to live by principle and schedule and not by my emotions. Lord, help me to remember that in ever small choice I make each day. I love You. I need You today. You are wonderful!

2009-07-13T06:39:00.000-07:00

1 Kings 10-11, 2 Chron 9

The queen of Sheba comes to Solomon's temple to see the greatness of the temple and to hear of Solomon's wisdom. She is greatly awed; Solomon doesn't hide anything from her, and he gave her all her desire. Perhaps this is the transition point that makes Solomon turn to strange women. His ego was stroked by the admiration of the queen of Sheba. Many other kings come to see his greatness and the things God bestowed to Solomon. Maybe he did, but I see no mention of Solomon giving glory to God. Not much longer he turns to the strange women and as the Bible says...

1 Kings 11:4
"For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father."

So sad...materialism can get the best of us. If I ever become blessed by God with riches...well I am blessed by God, but if it were to be monetarily--I would have to be careful that it doesn't become a curse. In fact, I must be careful of that now without great riches. I can get too comfortable in my "blessedness" that before I know it I've gradually made turns in the wrong direction that by the time I am old..."my heart is not perfect" God, I don't want that to be my testimony...the end of my life. That I had a good start, but my end meant getting Your blessing taken away from me.
Because of God's promise to David, He didn't take the kingdom away from Solomon, but He promised to take it from his Son. Perhaps that's the worst punishment. When our children have to reap what we have sown. Abba, please help me to be ever aware of when I stray. I don't want to lose out on not just Your blessing in my life, but Your favor...Your guidance.

2009-07-09T05:08:00.000-07:00

Proverbs 27-29

27:1 You're not promised tomorrow--make the best of today
2 Don't brag about yourself--let others
3 Foolish wrath is a burden.
4 Envy is worse than wrath or anger.
5 If you love someone, make sure they know it.
6 Friends tell you what you don't want to hear sometimes to help you, but enemies are deceitful and tell you things you want to hear.
7 When you're full not even good things are appetizing. But when you're hungry you'll eat anything. Don't get full on the world that there's no room for God.
8 Stay where you're supposed to be.
9 When giving advice to friends, do it sweetly.
10 Be a friend to your friends. Don't bother family during your times of trouble?
11 A wise some makes a happy father.
12 Have a plan--be wise enough to know there are things you should avoid.
13 ?
14 Be quiet in the morning. :)
15-16 Women who stir up problems are soooooooooo annoying. They are impossible to get away from, too.
17 Good friends make you a better person.
18 Whoever does the work deserves the reward.--hint hint...American government
19 My heart reveal who I really am.
20 Men's eyes can never be satified.
21 If I want to refine or make someone shine, praise them.
22 Foolish people never learn.
23-27 Know your finances--be a good steward of them. Prepare for the uncertain future for your household.

28:1 Wicked people are weinies---always running from things even when there isn't a problem.
Okay, I'm going to stop right there, God. I feel like this is a verse You want me to pay special attention to in our circumstance. Lord, I will share this one with my husband, and if it's from You help him to be able to accept it and feel the same way too.

He Knows Everything--Even the Smallest Details

2009-07-07T06:21:00.000-07:00

Ps 147-4 "He telleth the number of stars; he calleth them all by [their] names."

I love that verse. There are BILLIONS of stars---He know all of their names! If He knows all their names, I'm sure He has no problem remembering mine. God for some reason is thinks that stars are important enough to have names, so it reminds me that God is a personal God that cares about the smallest details. Not only is He that caring...He's that smart. I think about some people that are so smart--could wow you with book knowledge, but they know very little about detailed little things. Abba, I praise You for Your omniscience and Your infinite attention to details.

147:5 Great is our Lord, and of great power: his understanding is infinite.

What a reassuring verse. So true. God, You know it all. You can do it all! I claim Your understanding and power in our situation. Lord, show us Your power and help us to know Your understanding as well.

147:9-11 He giveth the beast his food, and to the young ravens which cry. He delighteth not in the strength of the horse: he taketh not pleasure in the legs of a man. The LORD taketh pleasure in them that fear him, in those that hope in his mercy.

Ravens are considered the most despicable of birds, yet, You care for them, too, God. What the world looks at as great and pleasurable--You don't. You are absolutely pleased with those that worship and fear You, the Creator, not Your creation.

God's Judgment Before His Mercy

2009-07-06T06:31:00.000-07:00

Ever feel like you are doing great in one area of your life and then another area seems to fall by the wayside? I am have fallen in that cycle. I have recently gotten back into the routine of exercising faithfully; it cut into my blogging time, though, and here I am trying to get back on track on that area. I have been reading still, but not blogging or meditating on what I have read as much. I can surely tell a difference in my Bible reading. It's not looked forward to with as much anticipation and I am doing it more as a duty of a checked list. I don't like that feeling, and I know my Bible holds so much more potential than that. Routine...it's something that the Christian constantly has to work at, but at the same time work against. The irony. :)

2 Chron 6-7, Psalm 136

Here Solomon is dedicating the temple to God and asking for Your divine judgment on Your children---punishment or reward--whatever they were deserving of.

6:30-31 --"Then hear thou from heaven thy dwelling place, and forgive, and render unto every man according unto all his ways, whose heart thou knowest; (for thou only knowest the hearts of the children of men:) That they may fear thee, to walk in thy ways, so long as they live in the land which thou gavest unto our fathers."

Solomon understood Your balance of justice---reward for the upright and punishment for the forward. But he also understood Your mercy. He pleaded that when after deserved punishment was come, if the people repented and turned back to You that You would accept them and hear their prayers. You confirmed You will do this...

7:12-15 "And the Lord appeared to Solomon by night, and said unto him, I have heard thy prayer, and have chosen this place to myself for an house of sacrifice. If I shut up heaven that there be no rain, or if I command the locusts to devour the land, and if I send pestilence among my people; If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. Now mine eyes shall be open, and mine ears attent unto the prayer [that is made] in this place."

Wow! I have read and heard that verse so many times, but now I see that Your mercy cannot come until Your judgment has fell and it makes the people repentant. Abba, I pray that for our America. May Your people see Your judgment on our land. May we all be willing to humble ourselves---not depending on our strong economy or government leaders, but You and be willing to turn from our wicked ways, so You can then heal our land. Forgive my sin, Abba. Help me to change whatever little area You chose in my life that keeps revival from happening in my own life and then in America.

2009-07-01T21:26:00.001-07:00

Prov 16-18
So much meet in those proverbs...like a buffet hard for me to get it all the first go around. Two meats I couldn't pass up...reproof entereth more into awise than a hundred stripes a fool...i believe the Bible teaches me that how I respond to reproof shows my true spirituality...do i scorn and despise the reprover or do i take the repoof and turn as the bible says?
I read a few verses also remarking about the impotance of a merry heart and the spirit as a part of good health. Its a proven fact that those who smile and are optomistic are healthier and often live longer lives. Today was Nancy Moore's funeral. She was only 52 but so much was said about her sweet spirit, though it didn't heal her...I think it healed those around her. Abba, I would rather like a short life and have great influence than live a long life with no influence for good. Abba, may my life be worth each breath that you invest into it.

2009-06-27T05:55:00.001-07:00

The strange woman is a crafty lady...well not a lady...woman. She is subtle in trapping her prey. Her victims are oblivious to her schemes. Wisdom, though, displays similar tactics. The difference is motives. Strange woman's are for evil and her gain. Wisdom's is for righteousness and blessing. It seems foolish that anyone would even choose the strange woman over wisdom. As I read about that harlots tricks, I think of how I should try those same things and apply them to wisdom for good. I should make wisdom and righteous just as if not more attractive than evil.

2009-06-24T21:10:00.001-07:00

Proverbs 1-3
God, i love how you work in an unhumanistic way...you said.."the fear of the lord is the beginning of knowledge." in other word i must realize you know it all and i don't before i can know it all. :) then there's the verse..."let not mercy and truth forsake thee." it struck at how you can't give mercy until you know the truth. In other words i must admit my guilt before i can be cleared of my guilt. I cant receive pardon if i dont think i need forgiveness. Perhaps thats what u want me to remember tonight...the truth and the mercy that followed when you saved me. I love u abba!

2009-06-23T20:57:00.001-07:00

Song of solomon

I must confess that if it weren't for a sermon explaining it when I was a teenager, I would be completely lost in this story. It certainly is hatd to piece toghether...
Two obsevations...1 I'm glad we use different similies to describe beauty these days. :) Don't think my breasts being described as roes (deer) is too flattering. 2. Love the verse "I AM MY BELOVED'S AND HIS DESIRE IS TOWARD ME." I guess you could take that verse 2 ways...God is mine and His desires are always toward my best interest. Or I am God's and He is absolutely nuts about me. I lile both thoughts actually. I kniw everything You do, Abba, is for my own good, and that's because You're crazy about me. You enjoy my presence. You like to walk with me . Man am I a lucky girl! I love You too, Lord!

2009-06-23T20:46:00.001-07:00

2009-06-20T06:19:00.001-07:00

Psalms 119....the largest chapter in the Bible, and nearly every verse talks about the law, statues, testimonies, or judgments. All the same of course. Proves how important Your word is, Lord. Your law provides: wisdom, comfort, direction, strength, protection, purpose, defense, happiness....just to name a few.
The verse..."I thoghts on my ways and turned my feet unto thy testimonies." caught my spirit. I continue to ask, Lord, for Your direction in every little path I take throughout the day. Abba, I know I am so horrible at making and thinking about this request in the morning, but help it to be "my meditation all the day." Help me be bold to witness and quick to give You praise all the time. Help me to REALLY think on all my ways and if they are pleasing to You. I love You, Abba. I need You today...everyday!!!

Purpose

2009-06-18T08:38:00.000-07:00

Today is my birthday!! Yeah, I'm 30!! So hard to believe. I still feel so young. I never get depressed about birthdays, in fact, I look forward to them, but this one just seems surreal. Anyway, this morning as I was driving I was talking to the Lord and thanking Him for the 30 years I've been alive and healthy to boot! I also thought about the great blessing of having a purpose, a reason to live. I have met many that feel like they are going through the motions of life and in the end it's all over. Thank you that the years I have had so far have had purpose, and I pray that years to come will continue to have purpose. I thought it so fitting when I came across these verses in my Bible reading from Psalms 115

115:3-8
But our God [is] in the heavens: he hath done whatsoever he hath pleased.
Their idols [are] silver and gold, the work of men's hands.
They have mouths, but they speak not: eyes have they, but they see not:
They have ears, but they hear not: noses have they, but they smell not:
They have hands, but they handle not: feet have they, but they walk not: neither speak they through their throat.
They that make them are like unto them; [so is] every one that trusteth in them.

How does that relate to what I just said...well the last verse ties it all together. Those worthless idols were just that, worthless, no purpose. They had all the likeness of something purposeful, but they weren't and God said that those who make them and worship them are just the same. I know I don't bow down, create or make any of those silver and gold idols--though I am guilty of putting other things before You sometimes, Lord, and things put ahead of You are idols, but, Abba, I don't want that empty feeling of being useless ever in my life. Help my hands, my heart, my eyes, my ears, my feet, everything to be fulfilling the exact purpose You have for me in my life. You deserve it, and to top it off, it sure makes me feel good too!

Serving Him & Giving

2009-06-17T08:24:00.000-07:00

I Chron. 28
28:9
And thou, Solomon my son, know thou the God of thy father, and serve him with a perfect heart and with a willing mind: for the LORD searcheth all hearts, and understandeth all the imaginations of the thoughts: if thou seek him, he will be found of thee; but if thou forsake him, he will cast thee off for ever.

I think this is the cry and admonition of all godly parents. "Choose God...know Him...be blessed by Him don't turn from Him." David wanted Solomon to have the same close relationship with God that he did. I pray the same thing for Destiny, my step-daughter. Such benefits that come from serving Him. Yes, there are hard times, but God loves you and wants to go through them WITH you. His arms are opening and willing to embrace you, but if you decide to mock His love and turn it away, his hand of judgment is thrown. God knows your heart. He sees what others cannot. Serve Him.
When I think of how I so want this in those who I influence---Destiny or anyone for that matter, I think of how God so wants this in my own life. Lord, You see my short comings, and I'm sure wish so much that I wouldn't be so stubborn and to instead have that "willing mind." Forgive me, Abba, when I grieve You. Help me to change and desire to serve You more especially by learning to serve my own family more and to have the right attitude as a wife. I want to do better at seeking You for everything, even the small decisions. A constant awareness of You in my day, my life.

29:9
Then the people rejoiced, for that they offered willingly, because with perfect heart they offered willingly to the LORD: and David the king also rejoiced with great joy.

I noticed this verse because right now our church is going through a difficult time financially. But I see how God is using it to bring revival to our preacher's life and hopefully to many families in our church. But I see the requirement here....with a perfect heart. The greatest giving can come from those whose hearts are perfect before the Lord. So I believe the right process of events is happening in our church right now, and that is an encouragement.

God's Thoughts and Direction

2009-06-16T05:17:00.001-07:00

Wow! It surely is overwhelming when I stop and try to think about how much God thinks about me.

139:17
How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!
139:18
[If] I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.

That certainly is the highest form of flattery. To know that I am a constant awareness in God's mind. He doesn't "misplace" me or forget what's happening in my life. He knows everything I am doing. That's hard to fathom that He does that for me, but harder to fathom that He does for everyone at the same time. My mind hurts thinking about it. :)

143:8
Cause me to hear thy lovingkindness in the morning; for in thee do I trust: cause me to know the way wherein I should walk; for I lift up my soul unto thee.

Every time I read the word "lovingkindness", I think to myself....awww that's so sweet! Thinking about this verse...hear thy lovingkindness. How in the world do I hear that? I think that means to sit still and be quiet....listen for God's still soft voice. When I hear Your lovingkindness like that I am also able to "know the way wherin I should walk." Abba, may my every step today be prefaced with You in mind---desiring Your direction to lead me even as simple as a route to walk or drive, to know that I am in the pathway of someone You have brought my way. Lead me, Lord, lead on.

145:17-19
The LORD [is] righteous in all his ways, and holy in all his works.
The LORD [is] nigh unto all them that call upon him, to all that call upon him in truth.
He will fulfil the desire of them that fear him: he also will hear their cry, and will save them.

What a great prayer promise!

Permanent Decisions Effects

2009-06-15T05:24:00.000-07:00

2 Sam 24, 1 Chron 21

24:1
And again the anger of the LORD was kindled against Israel, and he moved David against them to say, Go, number Israel and Judah.

21:1
And Satan stood up against Israel, and provoked David to number Israel.
21:2
And David said to Joab and to the rulers of the people, Go, number Israel from Beersheba even to Dan; and bring the number of them to me, that I may know [it].
21:3
And Joab answered, The LORD make his people an hundred times so many more as they [be]: but, my lord the king, [are] they not all my lord's servants? why then doth my lord require this thing? why will he be a cause of trespass to Israel?

It seems these verses are contradicting themselves in a way. Did Satan provoke him or God...that "he" in 1 Samuel is a little confusing. Anyway, obviously God didn't want him to number Israel, Joab knew this and warned David, too. But whatever the case, David is reacting to his emotions, rather than what he knew was right. The people suffered because of it. The prophet Gad told him he would have to choose between three curses: 7 yrs of famine, 3 months fleeing from enemies, or 3 days of pestilence. David chooses the pestilence. I don't think he realized that 70,000 men would die as a result and more could have died if he had not cried to God and built an altar.
This is another wake up call reminding me that my sins hurt more than just me. When I act out of emotions and do wrong, it may seem good on the temporary but the long term effects hurt me and others badly. Help me, Lord, to stop and think when I am angry, grieved, upset, or whatever emotion is overwhelming me--to not react, but have a plan to do what I know is right.
I remember a quote, "Don't sacrifice the permanent on the altar of the immediate." Good admonition.

1 Chron 22
Here David changes gears. He is now preparing for the permanent. Though he cannot build a temple for God, he makes preparations for his Solomon to do so. This is a mark of greatness...when you prepare for those who come behind you and not just looking out for yourself and what's happening in your lifetime.
So Lord after reading these passages, I realize that every decision should be made with the future in mind. The future of not only myself, but the future of those that follow behind me.

2009-06-13T21:37:00.001-07:00

Shortly after god had delivered d avid from the hand of saul, david writes a song...part of it says..."thy gentleness hath made me great." i certainly am not "great", but i completely agree that it is only by your gentleness that i am anything. This reminds me of that potter's wheel. The potter only makes gentle movements to mold the vessel. Yes, sometimes they are cutting and intrusive, but always gentle.
Another part of the song..."thou hast enlarged thy steps under me that I cannot fall." I envision a dad as he lets in tottering daughter step on his feet as he walks. Thats what I picture with You, God. I'm standing on Your feet as You hold me up. You truly have, Lord, kept me from falling and making alot of stupid decisions. You have kept me safe in normally unsafe conditions. Thank you abba for always gently leading me as I stand on Your feet.

Justice Not Fairness

2009-06-12T09:04:00.000-07:00

1 Samuel 19-21

Absalom has been killed by Joab, and David mourns for him. In my opinion, I think he waited too late to let Absalom know how important he was to him. For over what...20 years, I think. He avoided him. A little too late, David. Joab, one of David's captains, becomes quite upset with David because he's sad that Absalom is dead and is upset that they got the victory. I see here David kinda going through a depression. I see this in others lives often. They become passive about incidents in their lives, as David did, and then when grief comes it overwhelms them--not wanting to deal with problems on the immediate timing, but then lose it when it all falls apart. I don't know maybe I am judging David a little too hard. Not my place to judge, I guess.
After Joab ranting at David, I must confess that I am thoroughly confused at the incidents following....going after king of Sheba, Amasa, and old wise women....I tried to read it slowly and I still didn't understand what was going on.

In Samuel 21, though, it explains about a famine that happened in David's time. God explains that it is because of Saul's disobedience in killing the Gibeonites. David comes to the remaining Gibeonites and asks them what can be done to appease them for what Saul had done. They don't want gold or silver; they want the sons or grandsons of Saul that are living. David promises to send them over. Seven men are killed by the Gibeonites.
I don't know what to think of this....hmmm....when I sin,others often have to pay for my sins, too. The consequences don't just fall to me. I think of the legacy Saul left behind. Sometimes when people pass on their greatness is remembered and continued, instead remorse and punishment is left behind of Saul. What an awful inheritance to gain. "Your dad, grandad disobeyed God and now we're going to kill you." I guess some would think that is unfair. But it's justice. Justice isn't about fairness...it's about equating actions with the consequences. It's a natural law of nature as well. If I chose to poison my garden with harsh chemicals, not only do I lose out on my harvest, but I destroy the potential harvest of those who wish to plant after me. The only way to make it better is to completely tear up the ground and put down fresh dirt. This makes me think of what Jesus did for my salvation. I was ruined. I was fully deserving of justice, but He took the punishment. In His doing so, he ripped up the ruined ground in my heart and put a new start there. Thank you, Jesus. You are sooooooooooooo good to me.

2009-06-08T21:47:00.001-07:00

A variety of psalms

Thou hast put gladness in my heart more than in the times their corn and wine increased.

I think about that verse and how true it is for a christian focused on You. I am happier in my lowest times more than the wicked in his highest

2009-06-07T06:52:00.001-07:00

I must admit that David is not my favorite person from the Bible. It seems that in his latter years he lost his boldness and quickness to do right by judging his own family. His daughter Tamar is raped. He is wroth but he chooses to do nothing about it. Absalom is ticked and waits 2 years for justice until he decided to take matters into his own hand and kill amnon. Absalom is gone for 3 years...David doesn't seem to care. He's back in Jerusalem and still David doesn't want to see his face. Absalom has repentant heart but he us ignored until he ultimately decides to rise against David 40 years later.
I see a version torn relationship between david and his children.
I know Absalom is not without fault either. He let bitterness consume him.
Two sides to this story that were both the wrong choice....ignoring justice and taking justice into your own hands.
David had no reaction because if grief. Absalom reacted out of anger and bitterness. Because of this not only did David have a daughter raped but he lost two sons too.
This teaches me to rule those under me by principles not by my emotions. Ignoring a situation only makes things worse too. When its in my authority administer justice and do it quickly according to principles and decided consequences not emotions.

2009-06-03T20:07:00.001-07:00

I hate it when you try to do good for someone and they take it as bad intentions. Well I say I hate it, but I can't think of a specific incidence right now where that happened to me. Here David was trying to do something nice for the king of Ammon, but husband servants accuse David's me coming to bear gifts as spies and shave half their beards and rip their clothes to their buttocks. How's that foe appreciation? Not only that put they hire the syrian to go to war against Israel. Wow! So much for trying to do something nice.
After that (still reading chronologically) I read the psalm that David says he I weary of crying. His throat is dry from all the tears. I can relate to that. Perhaps he was so weary of always trying to do the right thing and seeming that so much turmoil came in return. As he wrote "my enemies wrongfully"
What do I get from these passages...hmmm...im certainly not alone in those times I have felt rejected. As David did, it is at those times I need to draw to my Saviour and feel His presence stronger than ever before.

2009-06-02T06:26:00.001-07:00

I read the wonderful story about mephibosheth. Love how this represents how God invited me, the forgotten to come and sit at His table and enjoy His goodness. Noticed this time about Ziba, the servant that was secondarily blessed because David decided to show kindness. Abba, You are so kind... Always looking for those who have been the outcasts of society...willing to make them royalty. Thank You.

2009-05-31T20:23:00.001-07:00

Rats! I can't remember the exact chapters I read Samuel somewhere and I chronicles 17 ...since I am reading chronologically it skips around.
anyway... I read about David and his dancing...his linen ephod and how michal despised hinder for doing such. The Bible even says "he danced with all his might." Maybe I am just revealing my humanity but that presents a very funny pic in my mind. He probably did look like an idiot out there, but it says that he danced before the Lord. Funny I should read this after sitting through an hour of a "christian" dance recital. After leaving there Jon and I discusses the seeming hypocrisy of such a thing. The music wasn't God honoring and the dancers didn't seem too glorifying in their apparel. I have learned though that good well meaning people are dance instructors and dancers themselves, but I wonder what the difference was in David's dancing and what we saw today? I think it was David's intentions, his reason for dancing...it was joy, excitement...not a memorized routine. In fact, He probably looked like a crazy man out there by Michal's account. That is what she was probably most embarrassed about...not that he was dancing, but that he seemed a little "overboard" for Jesus. Abba, I guess this lesson has taught me to not to become afraid of looking a little overboard myself. It seems those who were serious in prayer and worship were accused of looking drunk. Help me to get a little drunk in the Holy Spirit and not care what others think, too.

2009-05-30T05:42:00.001-07:00

A variety of psalms

Serve the Lord with gladness...
That is a good reminder for me to remember that serving, You Abba, is wonderful and a great way I can influence my family is by serving You with a happy attitude.
One Psalm emphasized the importance of surrounding yourself with the right influences.
I will set no wicked thing before mine eye...forward hearts, slanderers, deceit, prideful hearts. I must always be aware of the things/ people I have surrounding me and thus influencing me.

Another Doing Right Rightly Lesson

2009-05-27T06:21:00.000-07:00

I Chron. 13-16

The account of David carrying the ark back to the children of Israel...Uzza and his friend "drave the cart". Upon a crossing, Uzzah tries to steady the ark and touches it. God then kills him because it was commanded that noone could touch the ark of God. He had said it back in Joshua

Jos 3:3-4
And they commanded the people, saying, When ye see the ark of the covenant of the LORD your God, and the priests the Levites bearing it, then ye shall remove from your place, and go after it.
Yet there shall be a space between you and it, about two thousand cubits by measure:

God was specific to the instructions of how to carry it. Only the Levites could and there is no mention of animals helping to carry it. Because David didn't plan and do right "rightly" a man lost his life. The secular thinking "the end justifies the means" does not apply to God's thinking. He has rules for a reason. Everything is a symbol to something and when we choose to alter it to make the "end" we want, God does not bless that, in fact, He curses it. Sad thing is, that we tend to think that when He does punish us, He's being mean and cruel. When truthfully, we knew the rules before we started and felt breaking them was honorable for our cause of "right." Abba, help me to not be guilty of excusing bad actions to get right results.

Later David realizing his mistake:

15:2
Then David said, None ought to carry the ark of God but the Levites: for them hath the LORD chosen to carry the ark of God, and to minister unto him for ever.
15:13
For because ye [did it] not at the first, the LORD our God made a breach upon us, for that we sought him not after the due order.
15:14
So the priests and the Levites sanctified themselves to bring up the ark of the LORD God of Israel.
15:15
And the children of the Levites bare the ark of God upon their shoulders with the staves thereon, as Moses commanded according to the word of the LORD.

It's sad that Uzza had to lose his life first. If they would have carried it the way God said, it would have never become unstable and had to be "held." What a tragic leadership mistake. This teaches me not only to do right rightly, but to teach those who follow me to do right rightly and never put them in a position that makes them do right wrongly.

Gratitude

2009-05-26T07:42:00.000-07:00

Hello my beloved blog---I've been off the routine. I have been reading, but it so much more enjoyable when I have to "chew" on what I have read.

A variety of Psalms, a chapter in Chronicles, a chapter in Samuel--since I am reading through the Bible chronologically it does tend to skip here and there.

What did I read at home...oh yeah. I read about David and his mighty men. I came across that story about how they were at Bethlehem at David just wished for a drink of water. Crossing dangerous territory, they brought it to him, and David pours it out. Man! I would be man. I know David says it's almost sacred like blood the fact that they put their lives in danger for his simple request, but to toss it away! I would be offended. I think of how I would feel if I saved up some money for someone and gave it to them as a gift, and then they said, "I can't spend this. It's too valuable since you worked so hard to save it. In fact, I am going to rip it to shreds instead so I won't spend it." I guess this story teaches me to be grateful and show appreciation to people when they do acts of kindness. Though David was grateful, he sure had a strange way of showing it.

I read in Psalms about the turmoil You went through with the children of Israel. I was thinking about their attitudes the other day. It's not like they complained when things were bad, they complained when things weren't perfect. It's like You were always on trial. Abba, You are not on trial with me. You are good all the time no matter the circumstances. I will praise You in the dark and in the night. You are wonderful and greatly to be praised!!

2009-05-22T20:19:00.001-07:00

Variety of psalms...
I'm texting this from my phone, so I'm not able to copy and paste the verses.
I came across the verse...my God, my exceeding joy. I immediately felt convicted at how I don't behave like I believe that. Im guilty of treating You like an exceeding bore. It's really silly when I think about it. Once I start reading my Bible and meditating on what I have read, I do enjoy it.
Lord, I also read the verse about Your being the health of my countenance. May others see You in my expression, my attitude. I love You, Abba.

2009-05-22T20:18:00.001-07:00

Living By Principles, Secret Sins

2009-05-21T05:38:00.000-07:00

A variety of Psalms

So many good ones, but these jumped out at me...

16:7
I will bless the LORD, who hath given me counsel: my reins also instruct me in the night seasons.
16:8
I have set the LORD always before me: because [he is] at my right hand, I shall not be moved.

These verses prove the importance of living by the Bible (principles and convictions). If God says it, then I can rely on it, so that when the "night" the hard times comes, it is His word that are my reins. People don't get the chance to see what I truly believe until I am tested.

19:1
[[To the chief Musician, A Psalm of David.]] The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork.

I wonder how anyone can look at the stars and believe there is no God.

19:12
Who can understand [his] errors? cleanse thou me from secret [faults].
19:13
Keep back thy servant also from presumptuous [sins]; let them not have dominion over me: then shall I be upright, and I shall be innocent from the great transgression.
19:14
Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.

Secret sins....hmmm...guilty. I never noticed before how those verses are "conveniently" before the famous "let the words of my mouth." Abba, reveal to me those secret, presumptuous sins in my live that keep me from being upright. I don't want them to have dominion over me. I can be so guilty of thinking that since I don't drink, do drugs, etc. that I am covered, but Lord, You see the me that no one else sees----my sins of prayerlessness, critical attitude, unthankfulness, slothfulness. Abba, when You have control and not my faults, I feel free. Your bondage is much more freeing than the bondage of sin.

The Vicious Circle of Vengeance

2009-05-19T10:48:00.000-07:00

2 Samuel 1-4

It seems as though so many are trying to impress David by avenging his enemies. David really had a soft heart and remembered people for who they were and even trusted that they had changed when they said.
It seems David was so misunderstood. His friends felt like they were helping him when they took part in killing Saul, Saul's family, or his men. Joab killed Abner thinking he was doing him a favor. And to try and gain favor with David, two of Saul's sons kill their oldest brother.
It seems that when we get our minds focused on vengeance and vindication, our judgment becomes skewed, and we feel what we're doing "wrong" to make vengeance come about is justified.
Abba, please help the root of bitterness to never take root in my soul. To never let the attitude of vengeance for me or my family to take hold of my mind. It seems when I or anyone is guilty of this is only becomes a vicious circle that never ends.

Pro 19:22
The desire of a man [is] his kindness: and a poor man [is] better than a liar.

I love this verse. It reminds me to always be kind--that's what draws people to you, not sarcastic cutting remarks.

Forgiveness & Slothfulness

2009-05-18T06:33:00.000-07:00

A variety of Psalms

130:3
If thou, LORD, shouldest mark iniquities, O Lord, who shall stand?
130:4
But [there is] forgiveness with thee, that thou mayest be feared.

As I read verse 4, I found it kind of odd that it talks about forgiveness...that thou mayest be feared. That usually doesn't seem to go hand in hand, but the more I thought about it. It's true. Your power of judgment is great, Lord, but an even greater power is that You can forgive. You have the authority to forgive. More so, when I understand Your forgiveness that makes me want to please You more. It's such a precious characteristic about you, I don't want to take it for granted. Now as I am typing that, conviction hits my heart. I do take it for granted, Lord. I am guilty of not pleasing you again and again. Help Your forgiveness to create a healthy fear daily for You.

I am going back to daily reading my proverbs again. I have missed the good meat of them, and I really need to have verse to take to heart all day. Such good medicine those proverbs are.
Chapter 18

Pro 18:9
He also that is slothful in his work is brother to him that is a great waster.

This is a good one for me. I officially deleted my forum links on my favorites so I cannot "waste" time on them anymore at work. Yes, they can be used for good, but I tended to use them to waste time too often. Help me, Lord to be more profitable with my time today.

Your Lovingkindness

2009-05-15T07:02:00.000-07:00

Variety of Psalms,
I came across some of my favorite verses...

63:3-4
Because thy lovingkindness [is] better than life, my lips shall praise thee. Thus will I bless thee while I live: I will lift up my hands in thy name.

I love that word...lovingkindness. You think kindness would be enough for You to bestow, God, but it's more than that...lovingkindness. I looked up the meaning in Webster's..tender and benevolent affection. You truly bestow a lot of that to me, God. Amazing how that can be seeing that You are not tangible. Because of that, my lips shall praise thee. I will bless thee while I live.
My grandpa is in from out of town, and I had dinner with him last night. We enjoyed a meal together and then played dominoes. Afterwards we talked a little about life. He's 84 now, and so full of bitterness, unforgiveness, and regrets. Abba, help me to bless You and love You all the days of my life..praise You and remember Who You are and what You have done for me in my life, Your lovingkindness...it's better than life!

2009-05-14T08:13:00.000-07:00

Abba,

I was thinking this morning as I was reading...what do I need to help me today? What trials am I facing that I need something from You. Our house situation....Lord, we have tried to hold up our end of the bargain in every way possible. We have tried to be patient and kind to those involved. Lord, we need your wisdom there. You are obviously closing a lot of doors, please open up the right one, so we know which path to take...DIRECTION...that's what I need. My family drama...I am not having anyone attack me personally, but I am caught in the middle of the mess. Help me to know how to treat my mom, my brother, and my sisters. DISCRETION...that's what I need.

1 Samuel 25-27

Nabal, a son of Belial, a wicked hard man that only cared about his possesions. Nabal's wife, Abigail, understood he was a jerk, but was used by God to keep David from avenging himself. David had done so well at keeping from avenging himself from Saul, but I am sure eventually he got fed up with another person being a jerk to him. He felt it was time for some vengence. Luckily, or actually by God's sovereignty Abigail intervened and reminded him that God would fight his battles. Nabal ends up dying of a heart attack or stroke. David is then thankful that he didn't do "evil" and kill Nabal himself.
In Chapter 26, David faces Saul again. He had another opportunity to kill him, to avenge himself. David vows again to not touch the Lord's anointed. After realizing David spared his life, Saul again recognizes David's greatness.
David flees to Gath and Saul finally decides to not seek him anymore. Now David is in Ziklag.

I don't know how these stories personally apply to me today, but I am learning some principles to ingrain for the future.
1. Let God defend me when I am personally attacked. If I am in the right, He will avenge. Maybe this is what you are teaching us through the house, God we would like to avenge and certainly not kill anyone, but we feel like we have done everything right, and we've been done so wrong. Abba, please avenge us of a bad deal. :)
2. Abigail did right despite her husband's bad behavior. She became blessed by that later. God had her in that position for a reason.
3. David did good by helping Saul not to do evil. He fled the situation instead of continuing in the chase of it. When someone is trying to do me harm, avoid them.

My Focus

2009-05-13T07:13:00.000-07:00

Psalms 7, 27, 31, 34, 52

Such wonderful verses in these passages that I needed today. Thank you, Abba for reminding me of your goodness.

Pslams 7 reminds me to take my burdens to you. When I feel overwhelmed by enemies, You are the One my soul should cry out to---give my deep feelings to even about how much I want them hurt.

27:3
Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this [will] I [be] confident.
27:4
One [thing] have I desired of the LORD, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to enquire in his temple.
No matter what befalls me, I feel this is my same plea. Lord, help me never to be victim of my emotions, but forever let my focus still remain on You and serving You.

27:13
[I had fainted], unless I had believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.
27:14
Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.
So many times, I can faint with the weight of burdens, but I can go on because God IS good.

27:10
When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.
I feel like this a verse FOR ME. My father is no longer here, and I feel like I don't have a "mother" figure. You are that for me, God. You are my Abba. I feel closer to You than I ever have to my mom or dad.

31:3
For thou [art] my rock and my fortress; therefore for thy name's sake lead me, and guide me.
I love that word for You...Rock...stable, steady, unmoving, dependable structure in my life. When everything else in life is chaos, You are my constant. For that reason, I choose to follow You. Thank you, Abba.

31:23
O love the LORD, all ye his saints: [for] the LORD preserveth the faithful, and plentifully rewardeth the proud doer.
31:24
Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the LORD.
The older I get, the more valuable that word becomes to me....faithful. Anyone can be a flash in the pan, but it's those that stick through it again and again no matter the circumstances that deserve great honor. Faithful...that's what I want as a epithet on my tombstone.

34:8
O taste and see that the LORD [is] good: blessed [is] the man [that] trusteth in him.
34:9
O fear the LORD, ye his saints: for [there is] no want to them that fear him.
34:10
The young lions do lack, and suffer hunger: but they that seek the LORD shall not want any good [thing].
So true, God, I am lacking nothing. I have all I need. I am happy. I am very blessed.

34:12
What man [is he that] desireth life, [and] loveth [many] days, that he may see good?
34:13
Keep thy tongue from evil, and thy lips from speaking guile.
34:14
Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it.
Here's the formula for many days...many good days.
1. No potty mouth.
2. Don't be a meanie.
3. DO good things, not just "be" good.
4. Try to diligently make things right.

Thank You, Lord, for reminding me of my Focus, my Faith, & the Fulfillments required to see good.

Facing Your Enemies

2009-05-12T08:36:00.000-07:00

1 Samuel 21-24

David is running for his life from Saul. The run down:

1. David first goes to the priest, Ahimelech and asks for bread and a sword.
David could have used this time to "spill the beans" on Saul and let Ahimelech know what a jerk Saul is. He tells him nothing of the sort, just takes the bread and runs.
2. David comes to Gath. He hears the people talk about what a great man he is in that he has slain in ten thousands. I guess this makes him afraid that they will take the opportunity to kill him. So he acts like a mad man....I love this description....

21:13
And he changed his behaviour before them, and feigned himself mad in their hands, and scrabbled on the doors of the gate, and let his spittle fall down upon his beard.

Lesson...if you feel your life is in danger, act like a looney...surely they will leave you alone as they did in David's case.

3. David flees to the cave Adullum, and his friends and family come to him. What a motley crew of people....

22:2
And every one [that was] in distress, and every one that [was] in debt, and every one [that was] discontented, gathered themselves unto him; and he became a captain over them: and there were with him about four hundred men.

I laugh about this. Here David is trying to run for his life, now he's in charge of a whole group of people with issues while running for his life. Isn't that how leadership comes. David wasn't looking for a position as leader, but the people were looking for someone who could understand them, and they were willing to fight for someone who was "in their shoes." Perhaps, this kept David from getting too discouraged because he was taking care of some other people to besides himself.

4. Saul finds out David was found when going to Ahimelech. He is ticked. He rebukes his servants accusing them of being disloyal.
What a stark contrast of the leader David was. Saul demanded loyalty because they were servants. David earned loyalty because they wanted to be servants.

5. Saul confronts Ahimelech, and he is so mad at him that he has all the priest killed---85 of them. Even women, children, and animals were killed, too, in the city of Nob.
What a sad realization of what anger and bitterness does to someone. Innocent people are killed because Saul is so blinded by bitterness and vengence.

5. One of Ahimelech's sons escape and tell David what has happened. David's army flees and then they are told by God that he will deliver the Philistines into their hand in the land of Keilah. They do destroy the Philistines.
Though David had a personal battle going on, the battle for the Lord still raged. He couldn't just put down defending the Lord to be able to defend himself.

6. David's army is in Keilah. Saul's men feel this is their golden opportunity to besiege him. Instead, God puts Saul in David's path. In the cave, David cuts off a small piece of Saul's robe as he is sleeping.

7. David feels so incredibly guilty for just doing that although Saul sought his life. David still calls Saul "my lord". David chose to remember the good of Saul. He decided not to reward evil for evil. Even Saul recognizes that....

24:17
And he said to David, Thou [art] more righteous than I: for thou hast rewarded me good, whereas I have rewarded thee evil.

Saul realizes God's blessing is truly on David.
Wow. I would hope that I would be as valiant as David. My opportunity so show true righteousness is not when I am treated well, but rather when evil delivered to me. Reward evil with good. Help for hurt. Blessing for cursing. Love for hate. Help me Lord to rememeber when evil does comes...it is not just a trial but an opportunity to show true righteousness.

Behaving Yourself Wisely

2009-05-11T07:15:00.000-07:00

I fell off the bandwagon this past weekend, but I'm back. It's a new week. Amen!
1 Samuel 18-20
Saul is beginning his vengence against David. Because of his own pride, he wishes to destroy David. But instead of returning evil for evil, David returns evil with good. David could have rightfully defended himself. He probably could have even fought against Saul and killed him, but over and over the Bible mentions..."He behaved himself wisely." Not he gave into his temper and emotions like Saul did. Rage is the result of festered anger that is rooted in bitterness and envy. Saul let his emotions consume him, no longer was he seeking God's will or even thinking rationally. All of his time, his energy was set on destroyind David.
I think of David's incredible sorrow he must have felt. Here he had given his life and loyalty to Saul, and because of his obedience to him it made Saul jealous. David was completely undeserving of Saul's rage. I'm sure David loved Saul deeply, and I know how much it deeply hurts when you love someone, and they not only don't love you back but seek your hurt and destruction.
Why did God let David go through such a trial? Why couldn't it have been an easy transition into him being king? It was through this trial that so many of the Psalms are written that bring comfort to so many. I personally appreciate the revealed "humanity" of David in the Bible. He hurt just like I hurt. He loved like I love. He felt angry and jilted just like I do sometimes. It's through these unjust times in my life that I cling to my Abba the most---Understanding that it's His will that I pass through a fire to refine me.

Fighting God's Battles

2009-05-08T05:34:00.000-07:00

1 Samuel 17

I have read and heard countless sermons from this passage---David and Goliath. I asked the Lord to show me something from the story I hadn't noticed, heard before, or something that I just needed today.

I noticed how David's brother, Eliab, treated him...

17:28
And Eliab his eldest brother heard when he spake unto the men; and Eliab's anger was kindled against David, and he said, Why camest thou down hither? and with whom hast thou left those few sheep in the wilderness? I know thy pride, and the naughtiness of thine heart; for thou art come down that thou mightest see the battle.
17:29
And David said, What have I now done? [Is there] not a cause?

Though not as famous as the battle against Goliath, this was David's first battle. From within. Eliab's pride was hurt because here he had heard the rantings and ravings of Goliath for 40 days and had not done anything about it, and here David comes having just been there shortly claiming that he can win the victory. I would think that they would be glad that they found a willing servant, but instead I find this of critical people when I decide to fight for something.
1. They question your motives.
2. They automatically play the double standard game. They feel they should question other areas of your life.
3. They assume your motives are self-righteous just like theirs ours.
4. They feel like if they criticize you, it will excuse them of their responsibility to do the right thing that you're willing to do.

I have faced criticism in my family, in fact, from my older brother. We were both in the same "battle" at one point, and when I wanted to stand and continue on, instead of encouraging he would nit pick another area. Sadly, it's often those that you are in the "battle" with that criticize you the most. Expect that. I notice the Bible doesn't say anything about David responding and criticizing Eliab personally. Rather, he continues his focus to the real battle at hand. So must I.

I love seeing David's courage and extreme confidence...

17:46-47
This day will the LORD deliver thee into mine hand; and I will smite thee, and take thine head from thee.....And all this assembly shall know that the LORD saveth not with sword and spear: for the battle [is] the LORD'S, and he will give you into our hands.

Will, will, will. David was confident that God would be not only with him, but that He would defeat Goliath with him. I noticed that David said..."and take thine head," later another verse says "but [there was] no sword in the hand of David." David made this bold statement even when he had no sword in his hand! Perhaps he was staring looking at Goliath and saw his sword and was picturing that he would be the one using it. What courage!

Of course, I don't fight any literal "giants", but the cause for standing and fighting for right still exists. I consider these thoughts.
1. Anyone who defies God should be fought against.
2. Remaining silent to someone defying God will not win the battle.
3. Those that don't defy God, but aren't willing to fight will criticize those who are.
4. Remaining silent to those critics is the answer to that battle because they are not defying God, but rather defying my personal character. My continued actions for right will defend that.
5. Be confident that God will not only be with me in the battle when I defend Him but He will also defeat the enemy.
6. Expect God to use unconvential methods to fight His battles. (Just like He uses unconventional people. :) )

Are Your Insides Showing?

2009-05-07T06:15:00.000-07:00

1 Samuel

I love reading about how God came about choosing David to be king.
First of all, Samuel had to get out of his depression.

16:1
And the LORD said unto Samuel, How long wilt thou mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? fill thine horn with oil, and go, I will send thee to Jesse the Bethlehemite: for I have provided me a king among his sons.

Certainly, Samuel was very close to Saul, and though Saul blatantly disobeyed God, Samuel was still sad that he could no longer be king. Perhaps harder that accepting the consequences for my own sin is seeing the ones I love suffer the consequences for their sins. But I must trust God in His judgment and look toward the future as Samuel had to do.

I love how God chooses the unlikely character. I don't know (I still need to get my hands on a good book about Bible culture.) if Jesse knew Samuel was looking for a king among his sons. He just knew that he was going to anoint one of them with oil. They pause at his first son, Eliab, he's the oldest, he's tall and has all the physical expectations of a king. But God says...

16:7
But the LORD said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for [the LORD seeth] not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart.

I'm glad that with God's servants, it's not a pageant or a contest on what the outward show is. God sees the heart and knows the sincerity of me. That's refreshing but sometimes that's convicting. Wonder what I would look like if God turned me inside out and my "inside" became my "outside" appearance. Would I be dissheveled, crude face, dirty from filth I allowed in my mind. The critical thoughts would become free words out of my mouth. Honestly, really thinking about that is humbling. Sure, I know God SEES me, but really thinking about that hard...God really sees everything in me. I hang my head in shame. But at the same time, I feel free with that fact because God also knows my motives and when others question or criticize how I respond, I don't feel responsible to them because it's God that truly knows my heart, and it is Him whom I desire to please.

I notice, too, that God chose someone who is working. Not someone who was waiting in line to "certainly be chosen" but a worker, someone who was out in the field often looked over. I once heard in a sermon "God used all sorts of men in the Bible--murders, liars, adulterers, etc., but God has never used a lazy man." So true. Position should come to those who are not looking for it, but rather those who are working as if it does belong to them.

Thirdly, God chose a balanced person:

16:18
Then answered one of the servants, and said, Behold, I have seen a son of Jesse the Bethlehemite, [that is] cunning in playing, and a mighty valiant man, and a man of war, and prudent in matters, and a comely person, and the LORD [is] with him.

A lot of us try to be "fat" or excel in one area of our lives, but God proves by choosing David that it was the balance that was important. Help me, Abba, not to focus so much on being the BEST at this or that but rather at being GOOD at a lot of things.

Am I a Witch?

2009-05-06T06:33:00.000-07:00

1 Samuel 16

Another example of Saul doing right wrongly. This is the famous passage where he is told to kill all the Amalekites. Everthing, the king, men, women, children, sheep, every animal. Instead Saul choose to take Agag as a captive and save the best sheep, oxen, etc for a sacrifice. God is not impressed.

15:11
It repenteth me that I have set up Saul [to be] king: for he is turned back from following me, and hath not performed my commandments. And it grieved Samuel; and he cried unto the LORD all night.

Wow, those are some tough words. Here Saul is trying to do right, well just do it in his own way. Sure God told him to kill everything, but that didn't make sense. Surely, God wouldn't want the best to go to waste? So Saul felt he had obeyed...

15:13
And Samuel came to Saul: and Saul said unto him, Blessed [be] thou of the LORD: I have performed the commandment of the LORD.

How prideful Saul was to think that half obedience was full obedience. But Saul felt the end justified the means. When he realized he had been found out, he even blames the people instead of taking responsibility. Samuel had some harsh words for Saul.

15:22
And Samuel said, Hath the LORD [as great] delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey [is] better than sacrifice, [and] to hearken than the fat of rams.
15:23
For rebellion [is as] the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness [is as] iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from [being] king.

Wait a minute, Saul wasn't summoning evil spirits, performing Satanic rituals, or doing anything we would feel is great disobedience. In fact, he did MOST of what God wanted. Witchcraft? The sin here....some obedience isn't obedience at all. Saul was guilty of "doing what was right in his own eyes." When I obey I don't completely understand, shows God that I trust Him. He loves trust, because that's what obedience is...saying "I trust you know what's right for me to do." instead of showing great sacrifice to God.

There was a consequence for Saul's disobedience. He could no longer be king. Sin always has consequences. Yes, sin can be forgiven, but the consequences still remain.

I think of how the sin of disobedience applies in my life today. I can be a great servant to others and help them out, but if I slack on my duties as a wife to do so or have an unsubmissive spirit to my husband...I'm am just as guilty as a witch. Half obedience? That's an oxymoron. Can't be. Lord, reveal to me today what I am "half obeying" You about.

There's so much good stuff in the three chapters from today's Bible reading that I must break it up into a few days.

Doing Right the Wrong Way

2009-05-05T06:42:00.001-07:00

I Samuel 13-14

Saul, indeed an intriguing fellow. He decided that he was tired of waiting for Samuel, the priest, so he offered the burnt offering himself. His impatience assured him that he would not be king forever.
13:13
And Samuel said to Saul, Thou hast done foolishly: thou hast not kept the commandment of the LORD thy God, which he commanded thee: for now would the LORD have established thy kingdom upon Israel for ever.

I must admit, I am a little confused about the story with Jonathan. He initiates a great battle against the Philistines, and Israel has a great victory. Saul tells the people not to eat until the evening. Jonathan, not hearing his father's command, eats honey. The people tell him of his mistake and then he tells the Israelittes to enjoy in the spoil even meaning they eat the blood the of the animals they spoil---a known wrong for the Israellites. Saul tells Jonathan he must die for his disobedience, but the people saved Jonathan and his life is spared.
Jonathan didn't directly disobey, but he did later when he encouraged others to do wrong. I've never heard stories about Jonathan in a bad light, but I would think this is not a good example of Jonathan here. He may have had his life spared, but this may be the reason why he is not chosen to be king later. Usually the son takes the father's place, even when the father is wicked, but this one is completely taken from their family lineage.

Both of these accounts remind me that the end does not justify the means. I must not take God's commands lightly and do them in my own manner. What are my motives? Do I go about doing right in the wrong way? Do I speed to get to church on time? Am I dishonest in giving taxes, so I can give more to the church? Do I help others, but disregard to help my own family first? Help me Lord to do right, rightly.

Leaning on God, not man

2009-05-03T06:52:00.001-07:00

1 Sam 4-8

The ark of God has been taken and then returned. Samuel's sons are wicked, and the people want a king instead of God to rule over them. The words that struck me were...."that he may fight for us." Truly I can't imagine how this grieved your heart, God. Here they were so willing to give up the privilege of taking things to you. They gave up freedom, though hard at times for bondage. They wanted to be like other nations that had kings rather than lean on You.

I see our nation much like this today. Rather than trust in the Lord they trust in the government to take care of them. The king rule became the demise of Israel, and so it will be our demise in America.

Now for my personal application. I think you are teaching me that it is just as wrong for me to have my leaders go to You for me. I have the great opportunity and privilege to beseech you myself. Leaders are necessary, a picture of You, but they are not to be substituted for You. I remember as a senior in college, I went to Dr. Schaap, so he could help me decide what I needed to do with my future after graduating. Actually I didn't want him to "help me", I wanted him to tell me. After explaining the circumstances, he looked at me and said "I can't tell you what God's will is for your life." Though I left frustrated that day, I learned a great lesson. Instead of beseeching You and asking for Your help, I was leaning on a man of God to tell me what You want. I could have taken the time and asked You myself. Though, I do now go to leaders to get their insight, I have learned to go to You for my final decision. Nothing is quite as satisfying as knowing I am doing exactly what God wants me to do and has told ME to do personally.

Praying for Your Children

2009-05-02T08:35:00.001-07:00

1 sam 1-3

Wow, I learned some amazing truths about child rearing in this passage. It really is amazing that Samuel turned out to be great.

Although he wad raised in a priest's home, it wasn't a great situation. Eli's sons were wicked and God rebuked Eli because he "honored his sons above me (God)".

So basically...

1. Samuel had horrible influences around him.

2. Samuel had a weak father figure raising him.

3. To add to it, Samuel didn't even have a Bible to help guide him..."there was no open vision."

The only thing I can attribute to this child's tenderheartedness to God was God's grace and a praying mother. She wasn't there to create the "perfect enviroment". She had decided the greatest control she had over her son was to plead God's control.

Oh so convicting. Sometimes I am guilty of thinking that a perfect or atleast a really good environment would be the key to helping to raise a godly child, though that is important...greater importance is fervent prayer like Hannah's. Lord, I fail miserably at being a praying mother for Destiny and a praying sister for Ariel. Help me to change this. This is encouraging to know that the circumstances, that I cannot control, are not the key, but that my prayers, which I can control, can make all the difference.

Right In Their Own Eyes

2009-04-30T06:10:00.000-07:00

Judges 19-21

"Every man did that which was right in his own eyes."

This is a sad condition the children of Israel have put themselves in because they have not chosen God as their king and judge. Judges 19 tells a story about a Levites who journeys into Gibeah (where the Benjamites live) with his concubine. There men of Belial from that city rape and abuse her until she dies. This causes great contention between the children of Israel and the tribe of Benjamin. So much so that they go to war against each other and the army of Benjamites is destroyed.

I guess the Lord had this recorded in the Bible to show us what happens when we forsake Him and do what's right in our own eyes. It causes divisions in families.

The Binding Power of Sin

2009-04-29T05:36:00.000-07:00

Judges 16-18

Continuing to read about the life of Sampson...

Sampson becomes so bound and boastful in his sin that he feels it no longer affects him. He meets a harlot in Gaza then he finds Delilah among the Philistines. Sampson is proof of a man controlled by lust. He knows she's the wrong woman for him, but his lust causes him to stay and be nagged by him until he reveals his secret. Just as he gave into the nagging of the Philistine woman before, he lingers around sin.

16:20
And she said, The Philistines [be] upon thee, Samson. And he awoke out of his sleep, and said, I will go out as at other times before, and shake myself. And he wist not that the LORD was departed from him.

When he finally reveals his secret, he is so calloused by sin and the fact that he "got away with it" for so long that he feels this won't be his demise either. He finally reached the last straw with God, and he is left useless. It's not until he is humiliated that I see Sampson finally humbled and depending on the Lord for strength, instead of himself.

16:28
And Samson called unto the LORD, and said, O Lord GOD, remember me, I pray thee, and strengthen me, I pray thee, only this once, O God, that I may be at once avenged of the Philistines for my two eyes.

I think that I am like Sampson sometimes...so used to my routine and trained character that I rely on that for strength instead of You, Abba. I neeed to have a fear for sin and its binding powers and not take Your mercy for granted.

I read this quote from a commentary, I thought it was very profound..."Samson was the great conqueror who never allowed God to properly conquer him."

The Progression of Sin

2009-04-28T05:55:00.000-07:00

Judges 13-15

Sampson....a great fighter with a great temper. I reflect on so many faults in his life...

1. In finding a mate, he didn't respect his father and mother's wishes. He thought he knew what was right. He wanted to marry a Phillistine rather than an Israelitte.

2. When he killed the lion with his bare hands, he knew as a Nazarite he wasn't supposed to touch anything dead, but he was sneaky and didn't tell his parents.

3. Later he kills a lion and makes a joke of it by telling a riddle about it. He makes sin like it's fun and games.

4. He later loses his temper because they find out his riddle. He was so arrogant and prideful.

5. He tosses aside his wife because she told his riddle and later he comes back trying to have her back. Her father had let her marry another because he forsook her. Sampson becomes enraged and ties the foxes together, lights their tails and sends them into the camp of the Philistines. Their crops are destroyed. He wasn't willing to accept the consequences of his decisions.

6. Later the people of Judah find out what Sampson has done, and they bind him and deliver him to the Philistines. He didn't care that his decisions affected more people than just himself.

7. In the midst of the Philistines, Sampson breaks free of his ropes and takes the jawbone of an ass and kills a thousand of them. He still has no regard for his rules of separation, and he doesn't give credit to God but instead brags on himself and what he has done. He felt the end justified the means.

8. I need to post this verse, so I point out some things....
15:18
And he was sore athirst, and called on the LORD, and said, Thou hast given this great deliverance into the hand of thy servant: and now shall I die for thirst, and fall into the hand of the uncircumcised?
I can almost detect an arrogant tone. "You did this God. Why can't you do this for me?" I am amazed, though, because God does listen to him and hallows a place out of the jaw of the ass. This reminds me again that God uses everyone. He knows their intentions, and He uses them to propetuate His will. Though Sampson went about it wrong, God used him to bring deliverance to the Israelittes from the Philistines.

Sampson pictures the progression of the power of sin in one's life...
Choosing just something I want instead of God's perfect will...."little sins" that are secretive...become boastful and find sin amusing...become angry with those who call out my sins...seek revenge on those who deliver consequences for my sins...absolutely no regard for how my sin affects others...completely numb to any more conviction of sin

Abba help me to have a strong distaste for sin. I don't want to see this progression in my life. Weed out the little stuff before I have a whole garden of weeds.

2009-04-27T07:36:00.001-07:00

Jusges 8-12 Jephthanuh....an interesting fellow. Tbe bible makes sure to mention that he was the son of a harlot. Because of this his brothers make him an outcast. But later they plead for him to come back so he can be a capt to defeat the ammomites. He decides to help them out and vows to sacrifice what he later realizes is his daughter if God promises to be with him. He conquers Ammon and then faces criticism from Ephrahim for not calling on them to help defeat Ammon. He then fights against Ephrahim and wins.

Observations...
1. Often thr world, even those close to us, outcast us for things we had no control over. I can choose to let that make me be bitter and hateful toward them or choose to forgive and even be willing to help them in their time of need.
2. God knows the price of our vow before we make it. I must be willing ro still follow through when it doesn't happen the way I planned.

2009-04-25T21:14:00.001-07:00

Judges 6-7
I lve the story of gideon. He reminds me of me and how sometines i need extra extra proof of things. I can't wait to meet gideon in heaven. What a story! Defeating an innumerable army with just 300 men. You put the fear of God in them before the battle began. This reminds me that the battle is the Lords. You can do the heart work...the greatest battle.